Bitter Sweet Change The Beginning
by intricate.bella
Summary: Ryan is just entering the Cohen household, but there is one Cohen that is particularly dissatisfied with the guest. What will happen?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One

* * *

**

When Sandy Cohen first saw Ryan Atwood in the jail office, he felt obliged as his Public Defender to take care of him. He proposed one option, as he considered the parentless teen- Ryan- as his own son.

"Ryan," Sandy hesitated for a moment, unsure of how the young man would react to this offer. Sandy was well accustomed to young people, such as Ryan, who have already rebelled in law- to be cruel to people like himself, "I have an offer, you probably can't refuse. Come live with me, my wife and son, in Newport." Sandy waited for the beat up kid to reply, and all he received was a smile.

"Beats living on the street." Ryan smiled courageously. He wasn't completely ready to give up his identity as Ryan Atwood, for some superior house in Newport. He wanted to live the normal life, but after all the torture he had been through, he gave up this hope, of being himself. He figured, the only real way to survive in the world was to have someone to back him up.

"Great." Sandy exhaled, as if a huge weight had been lifted from his chest, "You know Ryan, you're a good kid." Sandy said smiling, as he grabbed his briefcase and headed to the door. Ryan- awestricken continued to sit propped up on the table, as he saw Sandy leave. He wasn't sure if he was to go- at this point he wasn't quite sure of anything. Life seemed so confusing to him, and after so much hatred, it felt a little funny that Sandy came out of nowhere and saved him from the sole thing Ryan was most ashamed of- homelessness. Ryan didn't want to be that person. He wasn't conceited, but of course he saw some potential in himself.

"What are you waiting for, Ryan? Let's go!" Sandy called out, and Ryan immediately jumped out of his seat. He followed Sandy like a shadow to his car. Once they were already inside, and well off on their way, Ryan's confusion hungrily gnawed at his brain.

"Mr. Cohen, why are you doing this for me? I'm sure you've had other street kids in your cases… why'd you choose me?" Ryan asked softly, not daring to look at his new guardian in the eye.

"You know, my wife is probably going to kill me- but it's not out of pity if that's what you mean. I just don't want someone as potentially well-off person, like yourself, to waste it. Besides, we've got room. Kirsten, my wife, has always been talking about more then one kid. It's such a perfect opportunity. I hope you like it at our home, because you're certainly welcome." Sandy looked at Ryan who was sitting in the passenger seat nervously, "Don't be afraid, Ryan. Gotta have a little faith, you know?" Ryan nodded, biting his lip gently. As bold of a person as he was, he could find no way in hell to erupt a certain aspect of confidence in himself.

"Can't help being afraid." Ryan said quietly.

"What are you afraid of?" Sandy asked curiously, his eyes concerned, his face relaxed, his body however tense. He hadn't before accepted a stranger into his home. Even Sandy wasn't ready to call Ryan a son. But he was willingly about to try.

"Everything," Ryan confessed. Ryan spoke in a quiet, almost shy voice as if he didn't want anything to hear him. He was deeply concentrated on basically nothing, "I guess a new house, new people, new way of living. Everything."

"There's nothing to be afraid of, Ryan. The more afraid you are, the more opportunities you miss," Sandy paused seeing the uncertainty in Ryan, "And by all means, if you don't want to stay here, feel free to leave. All I'm asking is that you check it out. Stay if you want to stay, because you are welcome in my home." Sandy said in a kind, fatherly tone. Ryan gaped around the community. These houses were bigger then anything he'd ever seen. His jaw dropped when Sandy parked the car, in front of a giant mansion. "Home, sweet, home." Sandy chanted out carefully. He grinned at Ryan, "This can be your home too- just let it be." Ryan got out of the car, and he couldn't help that his jaw was ultimately dropped.

"This is your," Ryan paused, and Sandy quickly interrupted.

"This is our home." Sandy patted Ryan on the back, as he entered the house. Ryan still, like a little ghost, followed Sandy into the beautiful place.

"Kiki, I have someone I'd love for you to meet." Sandy hollered kindly- Kirsten quickly appeared with a dish and a cloth in her hands. Her blonde, straight hair had carefully settled behind her ears. When she saw Ryan, she plastered one of her genuine, golden smiles.

"Hi, I'm Kirsten Cohen." Kirsten stuck out her hand.

"I'm Ryan Atwood." Ryan nodded and met his hand, with her's.

"Ryan, I'll take you to the pool house. Kirsten, I'd like to have a word, or two you." Sandy smiled, and went to show Ryan his stay.

"This is nothing like my old place." Ryan commented when he saw the dashing view of Newport, a stunning pool, and a contemporary view of the Cohen Residence.

"You know Ryan, make yourself comfortable. I'll have a word with my wife, I'll introduce you to Seth, and then we'll have dinner- as a family. OK?" Sandy asked Ryan, for approval, making sure what he had done was right, and that Ryan had no objections.

Ryan shrugged, "That's fine with me, Mr. Cohen. Thanks for, taking me in." Sandy smiled and nodded.

"No problem, son." Ryan waited a moment, after Sandy was gone, to question what he had heard. Of course it was an expression, but it was also an eerie choice of words- son. Ryan wasn't anyone's son at the moment. If he had a real father, he wouldn't be with Sandy in his house. If he had known Sandy a little more, then perhaps one day, he'd be his legal son. But not yet. As much as he wanted to escape his earlier life, full of crime and stupidity, Ryan wasn't sure if this 'change' was necessary. He wasn't sure, what his future holds.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

* * *

"Kirsten, listen to me! You didn't expect me to leave him there!" Sandy raised his arms, and slapped them at his side in discomfort and aggravation- simply because his wife was being so unnaturally inconsiderate.

"I also didn't expect you to bring your case into my household." Kirsten maintained a tense, yet very calm, and monotone voice while discussing the issue with Sandy. Kirsten closed her eyes, and inhaled. " Sandy! You don't even know him- why do you trust him? How can you assume that he's a good kid?" At this point, Kirsten blew her top of. Sandy hadn't seen her so upset with him in a long while.

"Kirsten," Sandy paused, searching for a way to persuade her correctly- he assumed granting her a free guilt trip would be nifty. "If you allow this boy to live on the streets, you'll regret it forever." Sandy shrugged, and went to hug his wife. He wrapped his arms around her petite body, and he kissed her forehead, "Just think about it, okay? Please, don't make any hasty decisions. A person's future depends on you." Sandy, obviously proud of himself- seeing that Kirsten was deep in thought. He nodded, and lessened his tight grip in his wife's waist.

"Damn you, Sandy." Kirsten whispered, with a small smile, lingering on her face.

"What's the matter?" Sandy asked, repeating her cute, yet oddly obnoxious smile.

"You're just such a thoughtful man, that's all." Kirsten started to shake her head, and she closed her eyes, still smiling. She gently touched her forehead, as if by doing so, she'd be absolved of all her problems and burdens- including the ones at work, home, and now the new addition, Ryan Atwood.

Sandy scrunched his nose dismissively and asked with utter sarcasm, "Me?" Sandy then plastered a completely stupefied look on his face. They both laughed intently, until Seth came in and barged in on the jolly moment.

"What's up, familia?" Seth asked, oblivious to the fact that he was about to be told about a brother. Kirsten's face hardened as she pooled for a few words to tell Seth to simply sit down, let alone announce Ryan's stay. Sandy looked at Kirsten, who was struggling, but trying to cover it up nevertheless. Seth's eyes widened, as if willing his parents to say something- anything would be good. "You can't be pregnant. Can't possibly be an alcoholic. Can't have cancer. Can't be flying to the moon. Okay, fine, I'm all out of guesses. What's up familia?" Seth repeated in the same impatient, and expectant voice.

"Sit down, Seth." Sandy touched his son's shoulder, and said in a stern voice that withdrew no evident reaction from Seth. He obediently sat down, and with the biggest, possibly most annoying puppy dog eyes, begged for a bone- except unmetamorphically speaking, he begged for the juicy news. Kirsten sat beside Seth, and smiled, as she touched his arm in a motherly gesture.

"Well, son," Kirsten paused, grinning from ear to ear, but Seth saw right through it- it was nothing as glowing and precious as her usual, real smiles, "I'm out of words. Sandy, you take it from here." Kirsten nodded, and sighed. She wasn't proud of the fact that she couldn't tell her own son, but she wasn't ready to speak it to the world.

"Alright Seth. Here's the deal," Sandy spoke in a orderly voice, as he swiftly sat down, and got straight to business. "Your mother, and I, have decided to take in a boy into our household. And that's it." As Sandy finished, Ryan as if on cue, came into the kitchen. Ryan hesitated, as he stood frozen seeing the family was having a discussion.

"Funny how you can always tell you're being talked about." Ryan smiled, and presented his luggage. Sandy got up abruptly, with a concerned look on his face. "No Mr. Cohen, it's okay. I can't invade your privacy- I've already made your work hell and I don't want to bug you anymore. I'll live somewhere else, it's really no big deal. I'm surprised that you even considered taking me in. I can't burden your wife, or even your son with my staying here. Just doesn't feel right." Ryan announced, already packed up to leave.

"No, Ryan," Kirsten spoke frantically, as she too got up, "You can't leave. You haven't even seen how life is around here. You owe it to Sandy to see at least that. If you don't like it, we can't stop you." Kirsten finally said, worried.

"We want you to stay here." Sandy then said right after Kirsten.

"Why?" Seth spat out quickly, unintentionally, but Sandy returned him a cold glare that made him melt in his seat.

"I," Ryan hesitated, and tried desperately not to respond to the twister of feelings that was going about inside him, "I," Ryan tried to breath, but more then anything he wanted to sit down. He hadn't yet been accompanied by such a situation- and never had he had so many emotions being evoked inside of him, particularly confusion. Life was so simple- he stole cars, fled, then laughed so hard about it with his brother, Tray. It was painstakingly difficult to attempt a good life, when his old life was full of empty promises, devious hate, and unbearable angst. Through much revision in his mind, a re-run of his life in a mini slideshow in his conscience, and much contemplation, Ryan shrugged and looked specially at Seth- looking for acceptance from his 'brother'. "I'll stay?" It played differently in his mind. He would pronounce these two words with sheer confidence, not hesitation. But he couldn't help how he felt- for once in his life he wasn't 120 sure- he was afraid.

"Oh, Honey, that's great." Kirsten smiled gently, and went to hug Ryan to celebrate the absolute bliss.

The End.

They all lived happily ever after.

As if. Although Ryan's conflict and resolution was evident, with staying at the Cohen's, he was still clueless about life. But that wasn't the biggest point. His soon to be, perhaps not yet legal brother, showed obvious signs of passionate dislike towards Ryan.

"Seth, why don't you show Ryan around?" Seth smiled and jumped up.

"Whoop-dee-doo!" Seth said sarcastically, in a schoolgirl, squeaky voice. Ryan controlled his intolerable craving of punching Seth (the macho-I-don't-know-who-I'm-dealing-with-punk). Ryan smiled at the idea, and with superficial happiness followed Seth. Seth let Ryan up the stairs, and briefly showed him the rooms, until he came upon his own.

"This is my palace." Seth grinned. Already Ryan and Seth were starting to hate each other with a burning craze.

"Seth, can we talk?" Ryan asked, as he stood outside Seth's room- while Seth made himself comfortable on his bed.

"For a moment, yes." Seth replied.

"Okay, since I'm going to be staying here- can we not live on a war ground?" Ryan asked.

"Oh dearest Ryan, what do you possibly mean?" Seth asked quite sarcastically in an English accent.

Ryan exhaled and shrugged, "You don't have much friends at school- do you?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

* * *

Seth shifted uncomfortably in his seat, but he resumed his idiocy momentarily. "Ryan, right?" Seth asked curiously, making sure he could prove his as-a-matter-of-fact point efficiently. Ryan nodded, "Celtic or Gaelic origin, meaning Young Royalty."

"What?" Ryan asked, squinting his eyes in confusion. He shook his head, in order to tip Seth off that he wasn't too comprehensive on what he just said.

"Your name. It means Young Royalty," He waited so Ryan could get the 'light bulb' over his head. When Ryan nodded, Seth continued to speak, "Well, Ryan, this is my palace. I'm the royalty here, and whatever you're planning- you're not going to get the love of my parents, the riches of my family, and you will definitely, never carry the Cohen last name. C'est OK?" Seth spoke as if he was speaking to a child, and Ryan was quite peeved.

"You know Seth, I'm not an idiot. Second of all, I want nothing that's yours, cause it wasn't my intention to come into your house- wait, 'palace'- and take everything away. I don't want it. And FYI, by the way, that means for your information, your father asked me to stay here. Don't worry- I didn't beg him to share his fortune, either." Ryan spoke about a word a minute, as slow as he could so that Seth could too feel degraded and possibly as humiliated as he made Ryan feel.

"That's believable. So, did it hurt?" Seth asked, appalled.

"Did what hurt?" Ryan asked stunned.

"When you brainwashed my father. Did it hurt you, at all? Or was it that kind of solo-impact thing?" Seth asked, making him look like a complete idiot.

"Actually, it hurt lots," Ryan decided to play along, but he wasn't much of an actor, "But you know what would hurt more?"

"What?" Seth asked, as if testing Ryan.

"You getting you're butt kicked in front of the school. Maybe you'd turn out a bigger idiot than you already are!" Ryan testified- he was actually quite giddy.

"You're staying in my house, and you want 'beef'." Seth tried hard to make his first impression more gangster rather then comic book nerd.

"Seth Cohen, I don't know you, but there's a slight chance that you should never say that word 'beef' in the sentence you used it in, again. It's fine when you say, 'I'm having beef for dinner,' or 'Beef is gooooood.' Comic book geeks don't try gangster. Just doesn't work, man." Ryan raised an eyebrow, hiding his satisfaction. He expected Seth to be all 'How did you know' in a moment. Ryan found Seth's type of people very predictable.

"How did you know?" Seth asked, as if he was told to by Heaven knows. Ryan closed his eyes, and laughed to himself.

"You might wanna remove that stack of comic books, before you pretend to be something you're not." Ryan's eyes trailed over to the stack of about 100 or so comic books, standing perfectly aligned beside the night table. Seth raised his index finger, and said:

"Ah, good point." Seth, flushed with embarrassment decided to call it quits- no more touring. "Alright that's the house. Thanks for coming. When you leave, take a brochure so you know Sandy'll always take ya back when you're in the poops." Seth faked a smile, and shut the door quickly as he shooed Ryan out. Ryan stood outside the door drowned in a certain unexplainable feeling toward Seth. Perhaps it was pity, perhaps hatred. Perhaps a bit of both worlds. Seth, of course feeling bad, soon returned to open the door.

"Are you up for a little bonding?" Seth squeaked in a guilty voice. He hadn't meant to be such a freak-maniac to Ryan, but he wanted to feel in power of something. Perhaps he should have known that Ryan was more the superhero rather then sidekick kind of guy. Seth shouldn't have tried to have a little puppy dog slave, because even according to looks, Ryan was pretty intimidating.

"What changed?" Ryan asked, trying to hide a grin. It was so easy to convince Seth that he was no one to mess with.

"I don't know. Maybe because you're a juvenile delinquent, and you can really kick my butt in a blink of an eye." Seth admitted humbly.

"I'm no criminal. I didn't come here to hurt anyone. I, myself, have come to change. I know nobody here, so how about we put all of this crap behind us and start new? It's a win-win situation." Ryan offered.

"You know Ryan, for a delinquent, you're a pretty decent man." Seth grinned and he stuck out his hand in a truce. When their hands met, in a manly confrontation of peace, they both knew it was going to be okay.

"Seth. I'm afraid if you call me a delinquent again, I'm just going to have to kill you." Ryan said seriously, and he cracked a wide grin when Seth's eyeballs almost fell out of their sockets. "Joke joke." Ryan winked.

"I knew that. Ha ha ha. You're freaking hilarious!" Seth said, his voice trailing off by the end of the sentence. He lowered his eyes, in embarrassment. "You're going to be pretty popular at school, Ryan. Hope you don't forget about the little people." Seth walked over to his desk, and started to fidget with a few papers to make it seem he were unaffected- busy.

"I'm not into popularity." Ryan said, seeing that Seth was uncomfortable- but not for the same reasons he had been before. Seth clearly saw a potential friend in Ryan, and the thought of loosing him bothered him.

"You can have any girl. You can be a jock- the best water polo jock. You can have everything. Why don't you dig the big life?" Seth asked confused. Seth was as shocked as a blow fish, that was just recently frightened into puffing up, and revealing countless spikes for protection.

"I already have this one girl. I suck at water polo. I don't need everything." Ryan replied simply.

"Who do you looooove? Cause the minute I saw you, I was hoping to set you up with this one chick… she's the full package, Ryan." Seth said intuitively.

"Her name's Teresa. I don't think she knows I've been 'relocated'." The sadness in Ryan's voice was apparent. He missed Teresa. "I've been with her since I was like, sixteen? Maybe earlier. She's beautiful, brilliant and thoughtful. She's perfect." Ryan was replaying an old memory he had of himself and Teresa, and he smiled.

"You do know phones exist, right?" Seth asked, as if he was surprised that Ryan hadn't called this girl by now.

"I don't know how to tell her." Ryan finally said, after a moment's time worth of thinking.

"You can start by saying, I live in Newport now." Seth assured him.

"That'll mean that it'll be over. No long distance relationships work, and if you try and tell me they do, I might not kill you- but I will knock you so good you'll never feed that crap to anybody else." Ryan said, as he sat down on Seth's bed. Ryan was clearly upset with the fact that he'll have to leave Teresa, with no decent goodbye.

"Once you see Marissa, you'll forget Teresa, man." Seth convinced him gently.

"Teresa is just," Ryan smiled to himself, and he glanced down at his hands as he fumbled with them, "Unforgettable."

"You're in Newport. You haven't seen the wild parties that needless to say I don't get invited to. You ain't seen nothing yet, buddy. If you can't ditch Teresa now, you're going to miss out on the ladies- and trust me they're going to be countless!" Seth remarked, pleased.

"Seth it's not that easy. Once you get tied down to a girl, you can't give her up. It's this feeling- it keeps you grounded. Even though I've had a not too good past, she's the one that changed me. She's the one that made me okay." Ryan said barely speaking, and when Seth heard just a faint squeak, it would be truly silent.

"You must really love this girl." Seth replied. Seth was touched that such a bad boy could be so good at heart. He was shocked, but at the same time knew love did crazy things. He hoped that one day, given the right girl, he would have the same.

"Love," Ryan shook his head and laughed, "Love is overrated. It's a joke." Ryan then shrugged and looked at Seth who, at this point was shocked.

"So what do you feel to this girl?"

"An attraction," Ryan paused, "But not love. Any girl who knows me, knows that I'm not into that crap. It's just so fake. You may 'love' a person in a moment, but other then family you can't love anyone. It's just worthless bull, at least to me. You can't love a stranger, and risk having them break your heart. The pain- unimaginable. That's why love is so useless, and that's why I don't fall in love." Ryan finally stopped when he saw that Seth was completely surprised.

"If what you feel to this girl isn't completely love, then you're out of your mind." Seth commented dumbly.

"It's not love." Ryan finally said slowly, so that it would slow ooze into Seth's dense mind.

"Just call her?" Seth asked Ryan.

"Fine. I'll call her." Ryan replied unsurely.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

* * *

"Hey Ryan," Teresa said in her soft, admirable voice, "I haven't seen you in a while. Is everything okay with Tray? I keep hearing little rumours. Tell me they're not all true. Where are you?" Teresa mumbled with worry.

"Teresa, I don't know what you heard, but I'm not going to be in Chino a lot." Ryan choked up. It killed him more then anything hearing the pain in Teresa's gentle voice.

"So they are true." Ryan could hear Teresa was now starting to cry on the other line of the telephone.

"Teresa, listen. Please. I'm going to be living in Newport now. Even though it's not far, I won't see you as often as I would love to." Ryan paused, and Teresa took it from there.

"Yeah, yeah I know. I understand Ryan," Teresa, although she was crying she tried to make herself invincible. "Long distance relationships never work, so we're just going to break-up, right? Okay. Talk to you soon. Bye." Teresa hung up, with a sniffle. Ryan didn't even try to stop her.

"I'm assuming that went pretty bad, judging by the look on your face." Seth said sympathetically, thinking that perhaps his idea of breaking up wasn't very good at all.

"You know what, it went fine. Perfectly fine for a break-up." Ryan answered sarcastically, as he gripped his head. He tried not to breathe, so he could soothe the aching hole in the pit of his stomach. But when he exhaled again, from the stabbing pain in his chest due to pre-suffocation, the excruciating feeling returned. It ate away hungrily at his conscience, and what was left of his broken heart. Ryan couldn't feel the shattered pieces of his heart disintegrating in his body, but he knew the pain he felt was definitely it. Ryan now started feeling as if he were going numb- his whole body tingling with a throbbing sting.

"Ryan, it'll be okay, you know." Seth tried to uselessly reassure Ryan, but Ryan was too swollen with an emotion he had to endure.

Ryan gulped, and retrieved his calm, intimidating facade, "You know," Ryan looked up at Seth, and then he shifted the hands that a little while earlier held the weight of his head on them. "Introduce me to Marissa." Seth's eyes widened again- Marissa Cooper already hated Seth for what he was, and she would hate him even more if he introduced Ryan, a man on the rebound to her.

"Are you sure that's such a good idea?" Seth tried to shoo Ryan away from the thought, "I think you should rest."

"Come on, Seth." Ryan smiled and got up eagerly. He tried to ignore the guilt that was powdering his soul so ungratefully.

"Oh boy…" Seth murmured in a quiet voice, making sure Ryan ceased to hear it. Seth walked out the front door, and crossed the lawn. He soon, with Ryan following closely behind him, reached a front door- Marissa Cooper's house.

"Hi?" As Marissa opened the door, she looked at Seth with disgust, but then when she saw Ryan her look was intrigued, and interested.

"Hi," Seth looked at her surprised, "It's Seth." Seth laughed to himself when he realised Marissa, his neighbour since forever hadn't ever took the time to learn his name, and Marissa just gave him a look, "Well, a friend of mine is staying at my place. I thought you might like to meet him," Marissa smiled shyly, and blushed as she looked at Ryan. She was unsure whether Ryan was another comic book geek, or a normal human being for once. Despite the possibilities, Marissa felt uncertain in his presence- she felt naked, spite the little clothes she even had on.

"I'm Ryan." Ryan nodded, and smiled a little smiled.

"Marissa Cooper." Marissa extended her arm, and she anticipated Ryan's in return. Ryan looked up at her, and finally extended his own. "We should hang out some time?" Marissa offered gently.

"Yeah. I guess we should." Ryan replied, also shyly. He got Goosebumps when he heard her gracious voice. Marissa unexpectedly, touched his arm, with the cold tips of her fingers, which made him wince a little. He didn't question what she did, because it felt so natural. Seth, however, was completely dumbfounded. He looked at the lanky brunette, her posh sense of style, perfectly adjusted hair, and Barbie doll face- and then he looked at Ryan, who was a few inches taller this girl, a slim and built figurine, and ruffled, dirty blonde hair that danced slowly in the evening breeze. "How about tonight, Marissa?" Ryan asked, out of the blue, his voice finally appearing after a moments worth of a void. Marissa's pearly white teeth almost glowed in the moonlight when she grinned from ear to ear.

"I'd like that." Marissa stated. Seth quickly glanced at his flirtatious friend, Ryan. He would exert some witty comment about how it's perfect, but he didn't want to ruin the moment completely.

"So I'll be going now?" Seth said, and he turned around to leave. Ryan then grasped his shoulder firmly.

"I think we should all bond- we are neighbours right?" Ryan offered, not looking at Marissa- who was probably hoping for a more thoughtful night.

Marissa almost choked at the thought of spending a night talking to Seth Cohen. But she smiled gracefully and invited them in. "So, Ryan, why are you staying at the Cohen's?" Ryan shot Seth an uneasy look- he hadn't expected such a rational question on their firs group date.

"Well, uh," Ryan stuttered hoping Seth would come in and steal the glory for a second.

"He's a friend of the family. His house in the Big Apple is undergoing renovation, so his family sent him here." Seth lied, but he didn't feel at all guilty, nor ashamed. He noticed from a tiny corner in his eye, that Ryan exhaled deeply and started to release all his tension.

"Tell me about yourself, Marissa. Boyfriends?" Ryan asked quickly, to show her he was capable of asking personal questions.

Marissa smiled, "Not at the moment, no. I'm single alright," Marissa paused and eyes Ryan deviously. Seth realised it was a two-part conversation, and he was just the third useless part, "How about you, Ryan?"

"Same." Ryan said.

"Guys, maybe I should really go." Seth said, but Ryan and Marissa were too self-absorbed actually having a conversation, that they didn't even object. Seth slipped away unnoticed, and left the two to chat. As moments passed, Ryan realised he had never had this kind of connection with any other girl. He could actually talk to Marissa about everything, and not be worried about it.

"I want to know you." Ryan said in a dreamy voice, and Marissa smiled only slightly. She wasn't absolutely comfortable about talking about herself, but it was an acceptable feeling.

"Well I have regular family, and home life. At school- I'm a little different. My life is at school, not because of my studies but because of who I am there. It's so superficial, I know," Marissa laughed at herself, but Ryan continued to listen- intrigued, "You know, the whole popularity thing?" Marissa wasn't sure why Ryan didn't judge her but she shrugged and continued, "Anyways, my best friend is Summer Roberts. I have had BFs before but nothing long-term." Marissa said, "How about you?"

"Well, I feel like I can tell you everything, but I'm scared that when I do, you'll be the first to judge me- being popular and all." Ryan hesitated, but Marissa gave him a thoughtful look and shook her head.

"I don't know this feeling between you and me, but all I can say is that you can trust me. That's just about it." Marissa said. Ryan imagined her on the cheerleading squad- the captain. 'Give me a C! Give me an R! Give me an A! Give me a Z! Give me a Y! What does that spell? CRAZY!' Ryan almost grunted at the thought of the deep Marissa in a slutty mini-skirt, that would nevertheless look hot, a tight top, and her voice preppy- Ryan was crazy alright, crazy about Marissa Cooper.

Teresa swallowed, as tears enveloped her cheeks, creating a dense layer of moistness on her bare flesh. Her mascara was dripping past her lip. God knows what happened to her cover up make-up. She bit her lip, and looked at the container filled with innocent looking pills. She had it planned perfectly. All she had to do was write tear-soaked suicide messages to those she loved, so they could understand that she was doing this for the right cause. But then another conflict mercilessly pounded in her throat- the only one she truly loved, was gone. Ryan was gone. So what was the point of writing useless messages, if they were all worthless, inadequate? She wiped her face once more, as she started to regain confidence. However, she was still pitifully afraid. As she touched the container, she saw a flashback of her life come before her eyes. All the beautiful moments she had seemed to wash away, one by one by one by one. Teresa closed her eyes, and she jerked open the container, moaning in depression and pain. She decided to make her death a slow, and agonizing one, so she could feel the gradual effects of each pill on her frail body. The benign night scared her, making shadows in her bedroom. But what scared her more was that she was about to end her own life.

She swallowed one pill, drinking down a shot of vodka. As the cold liquid, burned her throat she felt this was the only way. She waited what seemed forever- little did she know, it was only seconds.

She swallowed a second pill.

She swallowed a third pill. Teresa wanted to stop, but something inside of her urged her to keep going. So she didn't rebel- she continued to ruthlessly swallow the pills one at a time.

…

She swallowed a seventh pill. Around her, things were starting to turn a little hazy. Teresa wasn't stupid though- she had a goal that she wanted to reach, she wanted to see herself die. Her tears not wet her shirt, but still as incredulously as possible, she continued to swallow the pills one by one by one by one.

She swallowed a tenth pill. She started to feel numb, but she, of course, had to keep going.

She swallowed countless more- and then a sudden black quilt seemed to overshadow her mind. Her head bashed against the hard, wooden floor. Beads of blood started to appear, on the place where her head slammed against the floor. A small gash started to open. But Teresa couldn't feel it. She was far from alive. On the verge of death.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

* * *

"Teresa! Are you asleep?" Teresa's mother called from the kitchen on the bottom floor. When she heard no response she decided to check on her angel. She climbed the stairs slowly, as if knowing that nothing were to be wrong. When she quietly swung open the bedroom door, her face turned a blank shade of white, and frantic tears started to mould in her face. "Teresa! Teresa!" Teresa's mother shook her lifeless child restlessly, but then decided it was no use. She ran to the nearest telephone:

"Help! My daughter OD-ed. Help!" Teresa's mother quickly gave the police officer her address and with a frantic yelp screamed, "HURRY!" Her face was wet with tears, as she looked at her daughter, who had been crying also. The pills were scattered innocently on the bedroom floor. Teresa's mother dragged her daughter the best she could, lifting her occasionally.

"Teresa! You'll be okay!" Teresa's mother tried to soothe her motionless daughter, but most of all tried to soothe herself unsuccessfully. Soon the sirens started to holler in the background, but Teresa's mother was in a haze, not able to hear anything but the silence of her daughter, "Please Teresa! Wake up!" She begged, and soon a set of arms grabbed the hollow girl, and soon Teresa's mother felt herself drooping as her own eyes starting to twitch. She felt herself being grabbed by some one, but she didn't know what was going on anymore. She willed to stay awake, to stand by her daughter's side, but her body refused.

"She's waking up." Teresa's mother soon heard from the paramedics that were crowded around her- she soon saw them too.

"Where's my daughter? Where's my daughter?" Teresa's mother echoed as she lay flatly on the hospital bed. Her hair was tangled, and she had a burning feeling on her forehead but she couldn't care less.

"Your daughter is in desperate need of surgery. We need consent." A paramedic asked frantically.

"Go for it. Just make her okay!" Teresa's mother started to feel incredibly dizzy once more, and before she knew it her reflexes shuddered her quickly to the side of the bed, where she deposited her breakfast, lunch and very brief, lonely dinner. Now she had a blazing feeling scrounging in her throat, but her head soon flopped on the nearest pillow. She was then again, out cold.

"Ryan, what are you afraid of?" Marissa asked incredulously, wrapping her finger in her hair.

"Seriously?" Marissa nodded, "Pain. Death. Basically what every human being fears." Ryan admitted.

"That's not what I meant, Ryan. All of the guys that I would invite into my home would be naked on my bed by now. Why are you so different? Why do you actually have different intentions with a girl?" Marissa asked disbelievingly, and Ryan was completely shocked by this.

"I don't know," Ryan thought for a minute, "I bet when you invited me here, that's what you wanted?" Ryan eyed Marissa Cooper down like a hawk- when his eyes met her flesh she could feel a tingling sensation powder her skin.

"That's not it." Marissa technically lied, because that was what she expected.

"You know what?"

"What?" Marissa asked curiously, knowing she ruined moment. She then sat guiltily with silence on her bed.

"Maybe I am here for the wrong reasons. Maybe you invited me here for the wrong reasons. Maybe this whole thing is just wrong to begin with." Ryan shrugged and got up. He grabbed his coat, and turned to leave.

"Ryan," Marissa got up with him, but she couldn't just let him go. "Wait." Marissa ran up to him, and placed her hands quickly on his cheeks. She soon met her lips, with his embracing him in a long, busy kiss. Ryan, didn't know where to place his hands, in order to not violate the girl's space. He just awkwardly stood, positioned with Marissa Cooper wrapped around him, kissing him ever so gently. When her tongue entered his mouth, he pulled away. Ryan just gave her a confused, yet hurt look, before leaving. Ryan was hurt because he knew all this girl wanted was sex. Ryan wasn't ready for that, especially after Teresa. He wasn't that kind of guy. But he didn't yet know the kind of girl Marissa was.

"Ryan please," Marissa whispered, but her silent call was answered with the slamming of the door. Marissa melted into her sofa. She sat thoughtlessly on the couch, enduring hardcore confusion.

Why doesn't this guy want this, Marissa thought? She started to tease her hair, pulling it gently to relieve her stress- lately it happened to be a hobby. Marissa looked around deviously- nobody in sight. She decided to grab a cup, and pour herself some whiskey. When didn't some alcohol soothe stress? Apparently, Marissa didn't know the difference between take a sip, and getting wasted. After refilling her cup several times, she decided to ditch the cup and go to her bedroom- but not solo. She took the whiskey bottle, which was half full by the time she went up with it. As she watched old soap operas, she laughed unsobrely at the heart broken baboons that trailed the television screen. The hours went by, and Marissa only got drowsier, her eyelids heavier. Within a matter of time, Marissa was catching some Zs.

"Honey, I'," When Julie walked into Marissa's room, she froze at the sight of the empty whiskey bottle, the booming television screen, and her passed out daughter laying on the floor. She smirked, and decided to give her daughter a break tonight- she was probably too drunk to listen. She's deal with Marissa in the morning. She wrapped her daughter in a blanket, and gave her a good night kiss, ceasing to breathe when she smelt Marissa's breath carrying the alcoholic stench. Marissa seemed to sleep soundly, but when the first rays of sunlight, penetrated to the room in the morning, it blinded Marissa who was undergoing a powerful hangover. As she tried to resist the sunlight, she got up and attempted to close the curtains. Then she noticed the stabbing pain in her mind- the Hangover Headache. Instinctively, she gripped her head, as the pain gnawed at her skull.

"Sh it," Marissa said as she looked around, seeing no whiskey bottle, but a quiet, clean and serene bedroom. Marissa realised her mother had been there the night before. Marissa collapsed on her bed once more, and decided to skip a nasty day of school. Julie, however, wouldn't allow it. She came in, perkily, and jerked open the window curtains exposing the room to a new level of intense brightness.

"Rise and shine, princess." Julie said grinning, as she saw Marissa motionlessly lying on her bed. Marissa groaned seeing that her effort to close the curtains had vanished. "Wake up, Marissa." Julie chanted in an annoying sing-song voice. Marissa moaned again, louder. This meant: 'Screw you mother. I'm having a hangover, and I know you saw me out cold yesterday.'

"Maybe next time you shouldn't drink a swimming pool worth of whiskey. Your little body should really wait until the legal year of drinking alcohol is before actually drinking alcohol. Now you're such a smart cookie!" Julie said sarcastically. Marissa tried to say something, but only another groan escaped her mouth.

"You're not a caveman Marissa, you can use English- I understand that fine." Julie said, as she folded a few of the clothes patching Marissa's floor. "Marissa. Don't mess around! You drink, you pay. Sorry love." Julie said, and Marissa sat up on her bed.

"For once you can ditch the 'I'm a b itch' persona, and actually be a caring, loving mother for like ten seconds of my life." Marissa said coldly, as she took ahold of the neatly stacked and folded clothes. She then scattered them over her room again, "It's my room, mom." Marissa reminded her, and Julie looked at her daughter for a little longer then a moment's time.

"Honey, you're going to school whether you like it, or not. Because I don't care. You're going. Or I'm telling your principal you're having a hangover. Say bye-bye to that prissy award you wanted." Julie threatened in her 'I'm-capable-of-everything-sweetie' kind of voice.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six

* * *

**

"You wouldn't!" Marissa shrieked painfully, as she stared at her mother's blank face.

"Go to school." Julie said in an almost pleading command. Her voice was quiet, and gentle- it completely and utterly confused Marissa. Marissa rolled her eyes intensely, and looked through her drawers to find a decent outfit. What better impression to make then a pink mini-skirt and a hangover? So Marissa pulled the pink mini-skirt on to her long legs, and she then took off her shirt, exposing her silky bra. She searched endlessly in her drawers to make the perfect outfit. As she walked by the mirror, she glanced at her flawless body and smiled. Little did she know, she would have a visitor.

Ryan walked in unintentionally, on the shirtless Marissa, and he stopped completely, "Sorry…" He mumbled and walked away. Marissa smiled, and grabbed the first shirt she could see.

"Come in." Marissa urged. Ryan nervously walked in.

"I came by to apologize, for yesterday. Guess I'm going to have to come by tomorrow to apologize for today." Ryan didn't look Marissa in the eyes, but she grinned all the same in his presence. Ryan stood clumsily in front of Marissa Cooper, who was searching his face for any signs of satisfaction.

"Hopefully I'll have a shirt on then." Marissa joked, and Ryan smiled hesitantly. He couldn't get the thought of Marissa without one of her skanky shirts on that already revealed a lot. Ryan never imagined her so immaculate- her body thin, her flesh covered with a coppery tan.

"Well, I'm sorry again for yesterday." Ryan exhaled- he was more at ease now that Marissa found the situation slightly funny. "And I'm sorry for today." Ryan then added.

"Ryan, why are you sorry for yesterday?" Marissa asked, as she turned to her mirror and started to apply her face worth of make-up. She tried to seem casual, but her face gave it all away- she was curious, and worried that she had come on too fast. She was afraid that she scared a great guy away.

"Because we should have talked about our intentions. I shouldn't have assumed so much. We should have gotten to know each other, I guess." Ryan said meekly.

"You're right, we should have," Marissa paused and thought of something that Ryan would like to hear, "I'm sorry for not taking the time to get to know you, and hoping for something more then friendship. What else can you expect from Marissa Cooper?" Marissa laughed as she gargled down the joke. Ryan merely smiled. "Don't worry, you'll hear a handful at school. I'm the centre of gossip- and it's not always good. I just have to be half deaf for like 6 hours, and I'm fine." Marissa smiled, as she told most of her account to Ryan. He gazed at her sympathetically.

"Do you not care or something?" Ryan asked questionably, then he quickly added so he wouldn't erupt any confusion, "Don't you care about what people spread about you?"

"Of course I care. I learn not to though. I'm Marissa Cooper. I'm going to be popular either way." Marissa answered, "It's your first day at school, right?" Marissa didn't wait for a response, "I'll show you around. You and Seth, considering you're friends?" Marissa asked, almost stunned by the facts.

"Yeah, we're friends." Ryan replied coarsely.

"Well then it's a date." Marissa stopped at her choice of words, and she made a sour face as if wishing to take it back, "You know what I mean. Not a 'date' date, just a friendly kind of showing around date." Marissa looked at Ryan's face, "I'll shut up now." She herself nodded as she touched her lips together.

"Marissa, I also came here to make my intentions clear to you," Ryan paused when he saw the horror in Marissa's face- he assumed it wasn't something she wanted to hear, "I want to be friends." Ryan nodded to himself, not quite pleased with Marissa's silence.

"You read my mind." Marissa said very quickly, after a long silence. It sounded as if she hesitated, but she smiled and covered up her sadness. "Sorry, Ryan, I really, you know, I really gotta get ready. So I'll see you at school?" Marissa then replied nervously, stuttering every once in a while.

"Yup. Got it." Ryan said as he lifted his hand to wave. He then left Marissa in the dim silence so she could ponder her thoughts and understand what exactly she wanted from Ryan. Ryan left the house, saying a casual good bye to Julie, who was at the kitchen fidgeting with something she would call breakfast. Ryan crossed the green land, and entered the Cohen house.

"Where were you, Ryan?" Kirsten asked in a welcoming voice, with a kind smile on her face.

"Went to meet the neighbours." Ryan said as honestly as he could.

"Ah, I see," Kirsten grinned harder, as her eyes laughed, "Did you meet anyone special?" Kirsten asked referring to Marissa Cooper.

"Nah, not really. I made a friend, though." Ryan said.

"Come eat some breakfast. I'll bet it was a pretty rough day you had yesterday." Kirsten then changed the subject thoughtfully. Ryan's eyes widened as he saw the delectable meal in front of him.

"Is it some sort of celebration?" Ryan asked, but then he remembered- The Cohen's were slightly rich…

"No, why?" Kirsten asked as if she herself were forgetting something important.

"No it's nothing. Just at my house, we'd usually have Corn Flakes- frosted if we were lucky." Ryan laughed- Kirsten laughed sympathetically.

"No, honey, this is just a regular breakfast." Kirsten smiled then she turned around to hide her shock. She pretended that she were busy drying the dishes, but Ryan knew quite well what she thought. She thought that Ryan was a poor kid, and Kirsten had to pity him.

"You know, I'm not that hungry." Ryan finally announced to shatter the pitiful silence.

"No? A few seconds ago you looked starving!" Kirsten smiled, but Ryan quietly left the breakfast table. On the way out he bumped into Seth.

"Done already?" Seth asked confused, "Usually when people sit down and eat our kind of breakfasts, they stay a while!" Ryan smiled.

"Not hungry, Seth." Ryan nodded more to himself, and then he sped toward the door leading to his place of salvation, his sole sanctuary- the pool house. He opened the door, and as shocked as he was when he walked in, he kept strolling inside. Marissa sat on his bed, as if trifled with confusion and profound thought.

"Marissa." Ryan said, and he clearly managed to express his own confusion.

"Ryan," Marissa said nervously, "Do you believe in love at first sight?"

"No, not really, why?" Ryan asked, still not believing Marissa knew about the pool house, and knew that Ryan was staying there.

"Thought so. Never mind. See you later." Marissa brushed passed him, and Ryan could have sworn he saw a tear cripple in her eyes. Marissa opened the door, and she thought for a minute. She turned around, only to have her eyes' meet Ryan's.

"'Cause I do." Marissa quickly shuffled out of the pool house, and Ryan just stood- like a dumbstruck idiot.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

* * *

Ryan tried to breath, but he felt like something was clutching him from inside, and squeezing whatever it could grab a hold of. He tried to get up, but his legs gave out and he fell back down. What was this feeling he felt towards this girl? He couldn't put his finger on it, but it felt like more then a friendship- It felt like more then he ever had with Teresa. But he was deeply frightened that he messed it up with the most perfect girl. He misled her, in the cruellest way. Perhaps, she now thought of Ryan as an insensitive pig, without any feelings? 

Everything will be okay, Ryan tried to calm himself. However, Ryan's stomach said otherwise. He pressured himself to get up off from his behind, because he was going to be late for his first day of school. He exited the pool house in an orderly manner, but he ran like a psycho to the actual house, as he was petrified of giving people the wrong impression.

"Seth?" Ryan called out.

"Wefyah?" Seth responded, with a huge stack of scrambled eggs stuffed into his mouth. What he meant to say was, Yeah? But apparently it didn't come out as intended.

"We gotta go, do we not?" Ryan insisted, as Seth gulped down the chunk of scrambled eggs.

"You're right! Look at the time!" Seth jumped up like a little girl excited to play Barbies. He grabbed his keys and ran over to Kirsten to give her a big good-bye smooch. "Bye mom!" Seth ran through the door, and Ryan ran quickly after him. Seth got into the car, and exhaled. He waited until Ryan frantically got in the car.

"Why aren't you going?" Ryan asked quickly, as he fastened his seatbelt in lightning speed.

"Reality Check- school doesn't start until 9 o'clock. It is now 8:15. We have nothing to speed for!" Seth remarked. He was quite pleased with himself, and then with the leisurely speed of a crippled turtle walking through peanut butter, he turned on the engine with a wide grin on his face.

(A few minutes later, once the two got on the highway)

"We have nothing to speed for." Ryan mocked Seth angrily, as he glared at the huge roadblock. It's as if people had car accidents on purpose today, just to make Ryan and Seth late.

"How the hell was I supposed to know people would crash into trees, fall into ditches, and slam into each other? For heaven's sake, give me some credit! It's not like I summoned the death god to sabotage their cars." Seth said on his defense- Ryan could tell that Seth was too, just a wee bit annoyed.

"I don't care what you did. Get out of it. And fast." Ryan begged, but Seth merely stood, moving about an inch a minute- and even then it was a huge advance.

"So Ryan, how are things going with Marissa?" Seth asked unknowingly touching a sensitive spot.

"Is 'no comment' sufficient?" Ryan said in an uninterested voice.

"More then enough." Seth nodded, staring constantly on the car next to him, and wondering if the driver would stop gaping at the nearby accident, and start watching the road before he caused another accident- this time fists, and Seth Cohen involved. For traffic, neither Seth nor Ryan had patience. So they sat grumpily, listening to the only radio station that wasn't infested with static.

"Oh La dee da,

What a beautiful day!

The sun is shining swelly

I must say,"

Ryan and Seth looked at eachother, "Swelly isn't even a word." Seth beat Ryan to it, and yet they continued to listen to the absurd country artist.

"The world is turning

In a pretty fine direction

My boyfriend has a

Really nice complexion.

But that doesn't matter

'Cause nobody cares

You're alone in the world

With all your lonely scares

With no love at first sight

Cause we know it don't exist

The world is upbeat

If you listen to it's pace

So you gotta hurry up

Bcause life awaits, hun

This day might be your last

So live it like the sun."

Ryan couldn't stand hearing this half depressing, half reassuring tune. "Ah, what'd you do that for? I was kind of looking forward to hearing the 'Oh La dee da, What a beautiful day! The sun is shining swelly, I must say' line. Weren't you?" Seth asked, but Ryan only returned him a nice glare telling him exactly what he meant to say- shut up you idiot.

"Seth, do you have girlfriend?" Ryan asked upfront.

Seth blushed a little, but proudly replied, "Nope." Ryan couldn't be more surprised, in the most sarcastic way.

"Maybe it's because you listen to such sizzling music- it has an impact." Ryan said quickly.

Seth moved about a metre, or possibly two, "Woo hoo!" He cheered with genuine happiness encircling him. He was truly happy that he could get that much closer to where he wanted to be.

They arrived at school at approximately 9:27 a.m. Seth hadn't yet seen Ryan so peeved, but he decided to ignore it. He did do his best to get them to school on time- it wasn't his fault. It definitely wasn't his fault. When Ryan walked into his English class, Marissa shot him a worried look- it meant something like, 'Why are you late on your first day? I was supposed to show you around!'. Ryan shrugged in reply.

"Mr. Atwood, very swell to meet you. Mr. Cohen. Nice of you two to finally join us!" Mr. Gomahon welcomed them sarcastically. "Can you just tell us what we did in class? I don't think so. Because you weren't here." Mr. Gomahon said in a sing-song taunting voice. His high, quivery, off-tune voice etched into their brains. Nobody liked to be late on Mr. Gomahon's class- the torture was inexplicable.

"Sorry, sir. Really bad traffic. Thank God you weren't out there!" Seth said in a kissing up tone so Mr. Gomahon would leave them alone. Seth sat down in an empty seat in the middle row, and ushered Ryan right beside him.

"Before we were so rudely interrupted, we were talking about," Mr. Gomahon's discussions went on for a light-year, it was just something Ryan the new comer had to get used to. Ryan's chin was cupped in his hand, so he could support the weight of his head. Ryan felt a wincing sensation in his mouth- he desperately needed to yawn, and yet he didn't dare. Already, he realised Mr. Gomahon had the eyes of a hawk and the temper of a six-year old. If he weren't a teacher he'd throw a temper tantrum in about four seconds.

"Ryan, before we continue, why don't you, introduce yourself?" Mr. Gomahon spoke, as if he had discovered America- as if his idea was so amazing that he couldn't get a grip.

"Umm, no," Ryan tried to get out of it, but when he saw the deadly glare of his teacher, he couldn't resist. He got up awkwardly from his seat, as instructed gesticulatedly by his teacher. "I'm Ryan Atwood. I don't like water polo. I like video games, and I'm living with the Cohen's. Thank you." Ryan sat down, and returned the deadly glare at his teacher who presumably, was extremely satisfied.

"Moving on." Mr. Gomahon said, smiling especially at Ryan.

Class soon ended- and Seth and Ryan left side by side, as Seth was Ryan's new tour guide.

"Did you see how the guy was staring at you?" Seth asked giddy with surprise.

"It was uncomfortable, let's just say." Ryan answered.

"Well I'll bet. Rumour has it he has a thing for guys…" Seth's giddy pride now turned into a pitiful, disgusted look. "I think he digs you, Ryan." Seth joked. He didn't know Mr. Gomahon was out for a break, walking right behind him.

"You know, Mr. Cohen, rumours aren't always true." Seth turned around and saw his English teacher, with an angry, distorted look on his face. In seconds, Mr. Gomahon was speed walking ahead of them.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

* * *

"How much do you think he heard?" Seth asked intuitively, as he shuddered with the idea of his English teacher knowing what Seth really thinks about him. Because Seth graciously listens to rumours, and 75 of the time believes them, it was right about now that he regretted it all.

"I guess he heard it all." Ryan said almost in dismay, seeing that he could never again be partnered up with Seth considering Mr. Gomahon would hold a grudge longer then the world existed. Ryan simply smiled, and shrugged as the podgy Mr. Gomahon stalked off, leaving his personal stench behind.

"What am I going to do? Is it too late to transfer? Do you think he hates me? More then he does already?" Seth was speaking far too fast for human nature. Words were slapping Ryan in the face with no regret. Ryan rolled his eyes, and started to speak in a slow, soothing voice- however nothing worked to calm the psycho Seth.

"Seth Cohen," Ryan paused as he put his hands firmly on Seth's shoulders, ready to shake all the lunacy out of him if necessary. "Stop freaking out! What's the worst that can happen?"

The next day, Seth couldn't help but melt in his seat, "See? This is what happens!" Seth whispered dryly to Ryan, after Mr. Gomahon asked Seth to sing a portion of the poetry they were reading. When Seth collapsed into his chair, the colour in his cheeks finally started to cool down, returning to their normal pale colour, after being so rosy. However, Seth constantly felt dizzy, humiliated… This would definitely not look good on his overall school status: A singing comic book geek. How attractive!

"Mr. Cohen, I see you're talking again. Would you like to sing us chapter 5 of our textbooks? I'll bet it'll be yet another spectacle!" Mr. Gomahon grinned at Seth, and the class seemed to roar in laughter- at least in the narrow mind of Seth. The class' triumphant, mocking laughter made Seth twitch in his seat, and the cackling noise beat rhythmically in his ears.

"I'm sorry for calling you a homosexual!" Seth called out desperately, and the class went utterly silent. Seth grasped his head when he realised the shocked look on Mr. Gomahon's face- not only was it furious, but freakishly distorted in humiliation as well.

"Mr. Seth Cohen," The teacher stopped for a few eternal seconds, "If you think that is why you had to sing for us, you are sadly mistaken." Mr. Gomahon said severely, as his eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. "I appreciate your apology, but once again- your mischief was rewarded with the consequences, definitely not because of personal grudges I have, and will have against you."

"Why doesn't sorry get ya anywhere, anymore? What's the use?" Seth stood up, and slammed his fist (lightly) against his desk, to present his idea of justice? "Why is freedom of speech so neglected? What happened to forgive and forget?" All Seth Cohen needed was the national anthem humming in the background- a flag drifting through the air. But his moment was ruined.

"Sit down, Cohen." Mr. Gomahon ordered almost silently, but grimly all the same. Seth sighed, as if he was deprived of something he had to do. He glared at Mr. Gomahon who was intent on continuing his lesson. Seth started to kick one of the desk's legs, making an irritating, repetitive banging noise.

"Seth." Mr. Gomahon rarely called people 'improperly' without using their last name- Seth imagined that it was out of urgency to make him stop. Seth put his foot down obediently, and folded his hands neatly on his desk- in addition, he smiled as if he were attentive. "Thank you, sir." Mr. Gomahon said seeing Seth, the annoying little vegetable finally co-operating. "Now Seth- can you answer the question?" Mr. Gomahon's voice softened in satisfaction.

Seth pondered for a little bit and then answered, "Mr. Gomahon, are you married?" The class jerked with silent laughter, not wanting to giggle too hard for the fright that Mr. Gomahon's top would skyrocket.

"Yes. 24 beautiful years. With a woman." Mr. Gomahon accented the last portion of his sentence, "Does that mean anything to you?"

"Yes," Seth said for a moment, and he nodded to himself as if he were to approve what he was to say next, "Your wife must be blind, deaf and deprived of all other sensations seeing that she married you." Seth straightened up in his chair, although Mr. Gomahon's glare made him shiver. He wouldn't step down off his role now, though.

"Mr. Cohen, please step outside, with me." Seth almost gasped out loud, but the class seemed to fill up his intentions completely. Seth quivered when he got up, and when he was well outside; the honourable hands of Mr. Gomahon slammed the classroom door. The glass couldn't exactly hear what Mr. Gomahon, other then a few extremely loud outbursts. The saw a large amount of waving of the hands, and Mr. Gomahon's angry face. When Seth walked in, his shoulders were slouched and he was pale as a single, white dove.

"What happened?" Ryan whispered quietly to Seth when he sat down.

"I think I'm going to throw up." Seth admitted, when his face started to change colours from white to a light, pale shade of green.

The following days seemed to pass by uneventfully. Whenever Ryan passed Marissa, his head seemed to naturally fall toward the ground, and he ignored her completely. One day, like in a fairy tale, Ryan saw Summer Roberts leaning against her locker laughing to a group of friends- one of which stood Marissa. He looked at her intrigued, until Seth came and tapped him on the back.

"What are you? In to her?" Seth asked worriedly, but Ryan merely laughed.

"No, idiot. I'm just thinking how perfect she is," Ryan said as he stopped suspensefully, "For you." Ryan nodded and he continued to organize his already messy locker.

"As if. It's like matching a toad with a tiger. Except worse." Seth commented, but Ryan could see how infatuated he was with this girl. As if on cue, Summer looked toward them, still smiling, as she engaged in girl-talk. She nodded to her friends, and she turned around. She started to walk the 'supermodel on the runway' walk, in her pink high heels, and light pink outfit- her hair perfect as usual. Summer pressed her lips together, smudging the newly applied lip gloss against her lips. When she stopped directly in front of Ryan and Seth, Ryan could almost see Seth's heart dance toward the sky. Seth's face was enlightened, but nevertheless shy.

"Ryan Atwood," Summer said in an almost deceptive voice, "Right?" She raised an eyebrow, as if she had no right to wait for a reply. She felt so superior to them two.

"Yeah. And who are you?" Ryan asked almost playing around with her.

"I'll assume you're new here, and you didn't have time to look at the school's most popular b itches." Summer smiled, "Walk with me. Talk with me." She started to say in a more un-snobby tone.

Ryan sighed, and kept his tough guy persona, "Come on Seth." By saying this, Ryan fulfilled Seth's ultimate dream.

"Well you know, umm, I gotta," Seth tried to make himself look less desperate, but judging by the look Summer gave him, she nor Ryan didn't buy it.

"Seth, come on." Ryan said almost ordering him. Ryan walked by Summer, and Seth was on the other extremity. They walked for a little bit in silence, until Summer's voice finally showed up.

"Ryan, you're playing with my friend's heart. Do you have feelings for her, or do you not?" Summer asked very directly, wanting yes or no answers only- no explanations- Ryan knew that. "Ryan, I want honesty. I'm not taking your, or anybody else's bull. God, even my boyfriend doesn't know that yet." Summer complained very circuitously. "But that's no the point. Yes or no answers are fine. Whatever else I want to know, I'll ask." She added.

"Honestly? 'You'," Ryan said almost making 'you' sound like a completely different nation of people, "Want honesty?"

"Is that so hard to believe? I may be popular but damn, I'm not some whore. Dunno what you've been hearing…" Summer gave Ryan an almost disgusted look. "Listen, you're breaking Marissa's heart, and I can't stand if she's so bummed over a guy."

"A guy you don't know, and can't judge." Seth added in the midst. Summer was putting Ryan down, and Seth wouldn't tolerate it even if she was his princess.

"Seth, I don't need to hear it. Thanks." Summer nodded and continued to stare at Ryan, waiting for a reply. "Ryan, I need to know. Or are you not ready for such a commitment? One or the other?"

"I just don't think I'm ready to love someone I find a complete stranger." Ryan replied getting entangled with annoyance when Summer questioned him so rudely.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

* * *

"It wouldn't kill you to give her a freaking chance." Summer said as-a-matter-of-factly. She looked at Ryan concisely, as if searching for a change in his face- but she was severely unsuccessful.

"I talked to her. I listened to her. I don't think it'll work. I just don't think I'm in for all the same things she's in a relationship for." Ryan answered.

"What do you mean?" Summer asked quickly, defensively.

"I mean we're different people." Ryan replied as well as he knew how.

"What? If you want a same half, why don't you marry your twin or something? No girl is ever going to be the same as you. If she was, wouldn't that be slightly scary?" Summer asked rhetorically. "You know, what do you really mean that she's in it for different reasons?"

"Well," Ryan hesitated. How was he going to tell Summer, Marissa's 'lawyer' that she wanted nothing more then, well, sex. "All the wrong reasons, let's just say."

"Meaning what, Ryan? Will you speak up already?" Summer asked, irritated.

"She wants sex." Ryan said on his own guard.

"Don't you?" Summer asked as if shocked.

"Under circumstances. I need to know the girl. Love the girl. Not MAKE love to the girl after just seeing her." Ryan said respecting his own self, and helping this girl respect herself in one certain case. Ryan looked at Summer, who looked back at Ryan with a pout that meant, 'you're right, but I can't admit that'. Ryan smiled, and then he said, "You know, whatever I say you're just not going to agree with me, so there's no point of this discussion. If you're going to tell Marissa anything, tell her that I'm just not ready for a relationship, and that maybe eventually I will be."

"You think I'm going to snitch?" Summer asked, confused. She scrunched up her face- Seth thought it was the cutest thing.

"Obviously. Don't you always?" Ryan responded coldly, replying in the same manner Summer used toward him.

"Ryan, I'm not like that. Seth- for future reference, I'm not like that. Maybe you should care about people around you rather then what you hear about people around you." Summer looked hurt, before she turned around and walked swiftly away. Ryan felt slightly guilty, but Seth couldn't help but smile- he just had Summer talk to him. He was fluttering on cloud nine, amoung the other people who were mercilessly struck by Cupid's arrow and given the grace of such a beautiful feeling. Seth's eyes were excited, his heart pounding, his legs weak beneath him.

"Give it up, Seth." Ryan wasn't in the mood for any more 'love' idiocy. He's had too much already and he hadn't done anything. However, Seth could not be brought down. When Ryan turned to walk away, Seth gleefully followed him with a certain zing to each step.

Later on that day, Marissa started to walk up to Ryan. Ryan got nervous, as he didn't know what to say or how to act around her. Besides, she was the one that summoned little Miss B itch on him (also known as Summer).

"Hey Ryan, can we talk?" Marissa pleaded shyly. Her lines were practised, but still each word was indefinite and shaky.

"Sorry, uh, mmm, well, I gotta, I gunna, I have to, you know, I gotta go?" Ryan said and then scampered off. Marissa slapped her hand down, on her thigh. Her muscles beneath the hand stung and ached after the hard knock. Tears started to appear in Marissa's eyes, but she resisted. She felt overwhelmed with shame, anger, and sadness that her and Ryan would never be. She went to the nearest locker and she slammed her head against the coldness. Her head now felt a new sensation of pain, and chill shrivelling inside of her. Marissa tried to gulp, but something hard, was lodged inside her throat- perhaps an imaginary object that Marissa's consciousness placed there, or perhaps a thick wad of spit that had developed after her mouth had gone desert-dry. Her legs shook underneath the weight of her body. She felt like no one was there for her, until Summer came from behind and touched her shoulder.

"It'll be okay, Cooper." She said as she gently touched her friend's shoulder, looking around her, searching for something sacred, but nothing at all. Summer gulped- swearing revenge on Ryan for doing this to Marissa. Marissa was trying feverishly hard not to cry, but her face was already crimson, and her eyes a cherry red. Marissa frowned meaningfully, hoping that this feeling would go away. Never had she felt this way about a boy. Never had she felt this way about any one.

"You know what?" Summer paused looking at Marissa's newly hopeful face, "We should go out tonight. It'll be fun!" Summer insisted, when she saw Marissa start to frown again, "Come on Marissa! We can go to a club or something. We'll dance the night off. We always do that together when we're down. Come on? Please?" Summer whined gently, urging her friend to come with her.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Marissa said quietly.

Somehow, later that night, Summer managed to convince Marissa into going with her. Marissa was at Summer's house getting ready, with all the pizzazz encircling them. Marissa put on one of her own, favourite dresses- a strapless black and red ensemble, with a diagonal cut starting at the knees. She put on dazzling high heels that fit perfectly with the spectacular dress. Summer on the other hand, tried something fun- she put on a witty light green dress, of course a little short, that exposed her legs. She wore her comfortable, yet oddly fabulous shoes. The two stood in front of the mirror, applying layers and layers of make-up.

"Ta da!" Summer raised one hand to present herself, after applying make-up, doing her hair and getting ready. Marissa looked at her and smiled.

"Gorgeous, as always." Marissa said, smiling.

"Well, obviously you look hot. You're Cooper!" Summer joked, but meant it. "Are you ready to go?" Summer said as she grabbed her purse.

"Definitely." Marissa said, as she grabbed her own purse. At this moment, her cell phone started to ring informing Marissa that she received a text message. Marissa read it carefully, over and over again. Her face turned from half-excited, to worried. The message read:

"Hey sexy. F uck me, or I'll kill you. Bye B itch. Love- the only person that will ever love you." Marissa gulped as she read it aloud. Summer looked at Marissa confused.

"What the hell is that?" Summer asked in complete shock.

"Text message I got." Marissa started to breathe heavier. Soon, her cell phone rang again- giving her another text message.

"By the way, say hi to the sexy beast beside you- Summer. Love you both. I'll make love to you both, too." Marissa read out loud. She looked toward the window, and ran to close it. When she did she collapsed on Summer's bed.

"Marissa, who is it?" Summer said frantically, both of the girls were panicking.

"I don't know. But we're not going out tonight. Not until these messages stop." Marissa said, as her face turned white behind all the concealer she had on. Summer sat down behind her, shivering at every sound that went off in her house. She knew her father was at home, so she was safe.

"What if they don't stop?" Summer said quietly.

"I don't know…" Marissa shook her head as she cried intolerantly.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

* * *

Summer sat cuddled in a pillow on her bed, with her hands around her legs. She tried to think of who to accuse for such obscenities. Marissa too, was engaged in strong thought. She tried to think clearly but the thought of someone following the two scared her ultimately. Summer finally thought of who it might've possibly been. 

"Marissa," Summer gulped. She wasn't too keen on revealing her point of view, as Marissa would get quite angry. "What if it's Ryan?" Marissa was about to slap Summer in the face, but before she could, Summer rebounded, "Okay, that sounded stupider then it did in my head. Sorry. I know you really like him, and he wouldn't do that to you no matter how big an a ss he already is." Summer quickly apologized.

"I'm just so scared." Marissa announced. Her cell phone rang again, but she was so afraid to pick it up. Summer thoughtfully grabbed the phone and read the text message in her mind, so Marissa wouldn't be scarred by it.

"You should be scared, b itches. But don't worry, I'm good in bed. We'll get it on. Even tonight." Summer was shocked- usually she, like Marissa would be turned on. However these messages were different. These messages were somewhat threatening. Marissa grabbed the phone from Summer, and she threw it on Summer's bedroom floor hoping it would break, shatter. However the second it hit the ground, the cellular phone rang once more.

"I'm getting closer to your sexiness, ladies." Marissa read through sobs. She didn't know what to do, when she heard footsteps inching toward the bedroom door. Summer instinctively went to lock the door, but she was too late. The door knob was already turning ever so slowly. She was dead afraid, as she walked away slowly from the door. The door continued to open, second by second. The shadow of this person was evident. Summer tried to stop the tears from gathering in her eyes, but she was scared for her life. Summer and Marissa screamed when the masked man came through the door.

"Good," The man said in a deep voice, "I like 'em scared." The man walked up to Summer and he touched her lips. Summer not knowing what to do, punched the attacker in the stomach, and then using her boxing skills kept punching him multiple times. Marissa followed her lead- kicking the man with her high heel shoes until finally he asked for mercy.

"Summer, stop!" Summer's boyfriend took off his black, silky cloth. Summer looked at her boyfriend, in alarm. She was so pissed off at this point- no longer afraid- that she continued to punch the guy directly in the face as hard as she could.

"Never," Summer punched him hard, as he tried to shield himself, "try," Summer punched him once more while yelling out the words in severe anger, "that," Summer punched him in the nose- which was already bleeding by the time she threw the next punch, "Again!" Summer's boyfriend, Daniel, moved away from the last punch and he touched Summer's shoulders. Soon, he embraced her in an irresistible kiss. When he pulled away, Summer only seemed touched.

"It was a joke." Daniel said softly, looking into Summer's hurt eyes. Daniel ruffled his hair with his hand- he knew Summer loved that. However, Summer was too angry to let a kiss solve her problems. She looked at him gravely, and smacked him so hard in the face that her hand was left imprinted on his cheek.

"NEVER TALK TO ME AGAIN, F UCKER!" Summer shrieked out as she slammed open the door open for her ex-boyfriend. He walked out disappointedly. Marissa and Summer both collapsed on the bed, free from all anguish. Summer touched Marissa on the shoulder, as if apologizing for her distress. Summer felt stupid but relieved, as she fell for her boyfriend's irrational scam. A little while later, Summer's cell phone rang.

"Hello?" She picked up in annoyance.

"Baby, hey." Daniel was conveniently on the other line, "Are we over? Cause I don't want that."

"No sh it Sherlock!" Summer clicked off her phone with a smirk. Daniel heard the unwanted buzzing noise of the disconnected line, "It was Daniel. He asked if we were 'over'." Summer answered Marissa's 'look'. She smiled, but Summer could tell that she was a little shaken up. "Come on." Summer got up, and extended her hand for Marissa to take for support.

"I'm really not in the mood to go clubbing tonight." Marissa gulped sadly, but Summer's eyes lightened.

"Girl, we ain't going clubbing. Where can two gorgeous, dressed-up ladies go?" Summer asked deviously, but Marissa only shrugged in confusion. "Whatever- you're coming with me." Summer smiled. She grabbed a bikini from her closet, and told Marissa they'd stop by her house for a few seconds, too. When they did, Marissa was left in the car while Summer went to pick out the tiniest bikini she could find in Marissa's collection. Marissa only looked around, until Summer came out. When she ran out of the house, she waved to Marissa to come to her. So Marissa obediently left the car, locking it behind her. She ran to Summer as some excitement was starting to stack up inside of her.

"Get dressed over there." Summer pointed to some bushes. "I'll get dressed over there." Summer pointed to yet another growth of vegetation. "We're going swimming." Summer raised her eyebrow, and Marissa knew she was up to something. When Marissa pulled on her bikini, she noticed Summer not only picked her hot red bikini, it was about 2 sizes too small and revealed about 10 times too much. But whatever was in Summer's plan, Marissa was in too far to back out. When Summer came out of her petite shrub, she was also wearing a very tiny bikini, black of colour. It revealed the girls' long legs, slim bodies and everything else they had to offer. Summer grabbed Marissa's fingers and she led her to a nearby pool.

"Who's house is this?" Marissa didn't recognize it in the darkness.

"Who gives a damn?" Summer replied excitedly. She hopped inside, and the cool chill of the water intertwined through her body. The brunette, step-by-step also came in. In their minuscule bikinis, they swam around having the most fun they had ever had in a long time. Summer was in for trouble when she proposed a dare, "Marissa Cooper, I dare you to swim nude for ten minutes." Summer smirked deviously, "Of course I won't watch." Summer laughed, as she shocked Marissa.

"You're kidding right?" Marissa asked, finding the situation quite funny. "Well then I double dare you to swim nude for twenty minutes." Marissa answered in the same sinister tone. Summer looked at Marissa excitedly, as she started to untie her top bikini. Marissa followed immediately not wanting to be lost behind. When the girls were topless, Summer raised an eyebrow and she slowly started to take off her bottom. When she did Marissa started to as well, looking straight into Summer's eyes. Once the girls were butt naked, Summer got out of the pool for a second, or two, and brought some goods- meaning alcohol. Marissa nearly dodged at it, when Summer carried it over. Marissa took a sip of it, but then dropped the slow sophisticated drinking, and gulped it down. After a couple of glasses of alcohol, both Marissa and Summer were out cold.

"Let's get dressed." Marissa gulped after a lot longer then ten minutes were up.

"You're right. We should." Summer said, as she searched for her bikini. She was too drunk to see straight though. When she finally found her bikini, she quickly got dressed as she heard someone exiting from the house. "Ryan!" Summer said excitedly. Ryan almost wished he hadn't left the house, when he saw Marissa and Summer drunk, in tiny bikinis, in his pool.

"Come on, ladies. You gotta come out of there." Ryan took up the responsibility of removing the two giggly girls from the pool. There was no right way to take them out of there, as not to violate either girl's privacy- they WERE almost naked with a thin, by now almost see-through material around them.

"Oh Ryan, my hero." Summer said as she gripped Ryan's arm. Marissa entangled herself around his neck. It was never good having two drunken chicks doing things they would never do in everyday life. Soon, Seth came from around the corner. When he saw Summer wrapped around Ryan amorously, he tried to meet his eyes with the desperate Ryan. When he did, pain and suffering were entangled in his dark eyes and Ryan knew Seth had thought they were busy doing something they shouldn't have been doing in the first place.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

* * *

"Seth! Come back here!" Ryan called out, having Summer and Marissa constantly wrapped around him. "Get off me." Ryan barked at the two, as he sat them down on two patio chairs. Marissa and Summer were both fascinated with the fine art of the weaving that covered the chair. "Don't move." Ryan called out to them both- but he knew they wouldn't move or they'd fall flat on their faces. Ryan ran out to the house, and he jumped every three stairs going up to Seth's room. Once he reached it, Seth was hidden under his covers and his ears were covered with a clean, white pillow.

"Seth, listen to m," Ryan was rudely interrupted by a muffled voice- Seth's.

"La la la la!" Seth sang out to himself in order to ignore Ryan's voice.

"Seth, let me ta,"

"La la la la la la la!" Seth chanted a little longer, hoping Ryan would get the picture and leave.

"Seth!" Ryan was getting slightly annoyed by Seth's ignorance.

"La!"

"Or I'll tell Kirsten how you treated Mr. Gomahon." Ryan said in a lightning speed before Seth could sing another 'la' out loud. Seth sat up.

"You evil little twerp. Is that why you invaded MY house? Take the love of my life? Ruin my school life? Take my glory?" Seth so wrongly accused Ryan, however he was used to it so he said nothing. In a second's time, he heard two very giggly girls tiptoe outside the door.

"Your lovers are here." Ryan commented, and smiled at Seth when he saw his face ease.

Ryan heard Marissa's angelic laugh, but he quickly let that thought go. He couldn't fall in love with Marissa Cooper. Ryan knew that.

"Seth?" Summer sang out while giggling dearly, "I've got a surprise for you." Seth looked from Marissa, to Ryan, to Summer and over and over again. Summer walked over seductively toward Seth, and she sat down right on his lap. Before Seth could register the sitting down, Summer's lips were plastered all over his. Seth didn't know how to react to having this beautiful girl kissing him, but he pulled her away. She was drunk, and she would never do that if she were sober. Seth decided not to take advantage of the girl.

"Now Marissa," Summer raised her head as she laughed, "I dare you to make out with Ryan Atwood." Summer burped softly, and she laughed crazily out loud. Marissa, as drunk as she was, figured that something was wrong, however she went along with the dare anyways. Before Ryan could turn away, Marissa was hanging on his shoulders, kissing him passionately. He wanted to throw her off of him, but that would only hurt the drunk girl. So he kissed her back- because he had to. Marissa continued to kiss Ryan, until her breath ran out. Even then, she inhaled as deep as she could and she continued. When she finally surrendered, Ryan was completely shocked and his mouth yearned to touch her's once more. Seth raised his eyebrow when he saw that Ryan had actually enjoyed the long, ardent kiss. Ryan shook his head, but the ever so forgiving Seth constantly smiled.

"Summer, I dare you to strip for your pal Seth." Marissa said. She then started to turn a little green, and she turned around to vomit right on the expensive bedroom carpet in Seth's room. Marissa wiped her mouth, and continued to tower over Summer, daring her to do so.

"Let's both do it." Summer giggled, as she unzipped her newly put on pants and started to pull them down slowly. Seth was enjoying Summer's striptease, but Ryan wouldn't tolerate it. He made Marissa sit down, so she wouldn't have to expose herself to Seth or Summer. Summer then started to slip off her shirt, and she swung it around her finger while shaking her hips.

"What's going on here?" When Kirsten walked in, and saw the half-naked drunk Summer on top of Seth, and the calm, yet oddly drunk Marissa on the bed with them two, she thought she would pass out. When she saw Ryan turned toward the corner so he wouldn't have to infringe the trustful bond he had with the girls, Kirsten merely smiled but as quickly as the smile came it vanished. "Seth, what is going on here?" Kirsten pressed.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

* * *

The loud noise made both Marissa and Summer cringe; Ryan offered to take the girls home so he himself wouldn't have to listen to Kirsten. Never had he seen the kind lady so mad. However she was spitting random words of disgust and anger toward her son, Seth. 

After the hectic evening, and even busier morning, seeing that Sandy conveniently found out about last night's events Seth and Ryan decided to go to school without speech. When Ryan saw both girls, Summer and Marissa at school not only did he question the major hangover, but he also was shocked. He wondered if they remembered anything that happened that night, but he chose not to ask about it nevertheless. Ryan and Seth trudged to the school hall, and back to their lockers to relinquish their homework books, and take out other books. Surprisingly, their day got about 2.5 better when Mr. Gomahon got the flu and stayed at home. However, he was replaced by a mime- and this was no joke.

Whatever this tall, scrawny, even pale woman would like to say, she wrote on the board. The class gave her the benefit of the doubt of having a cold. Marissa then flung a note toward Ryan, which landed neatly on the edge of his desk. Ryan raised his eyebrow, and he quietly uncrumpled the pink wad of paper.

'Thanks for taking my drunk ass home.' Ryan turned to look at her, but she was far too quick to look him back. She seemed to be listening to the teacher, which was highly unlikely. Ryan turned back around, only to see his supply teacher glaring at Ryan vividly expressing plenty emotions through her silent face. Ryan slouched down in his seat, and started to doodle whatever came to his mind. The day seemed to drift by endlessly, especially with the school's eyes on him. It's as if Marissa and Summer managed to tell everyone what a 'hero' Ryan was. By the end of lunch period, a small blonde approached him. He didn't quite know who she was, but she wore a mischievous grin on her face. When she noticed Ryan's confused look, she quickly answered.

"It's Jess." She said in a way, as if mocking Ryan for not knowing who she was. People like Marissa and Summer, he knew, but how was he supposed to know random individuals from the school?

"Ryan." Ryan nodded steadily.

"I know," Jess' eyes widened as if she had just been called an idiot or something, "I know you, Ryan." She smiled gently, "I've been hearing a lot about you, lately. I'd have to live in a rock to not know who the legendary Ryan Atwood who saves drunk whores from his friend's bedroom." Jess said deviously. She smirked in satisfaction when she saw Ryan somewhat angered by her words.

"Who are you referring to?" Ryan asked pretending to be dumb, which he was far from.

"Don't play dumb. Here's the thing, Ryan." Jess paused, as she toyed with her blonde hair, smiling at Ryan as she flaunted her almost fully exposed chest. She smiled frivolously, "I think we'd be good together, don't you?" Ryan paused for a minute. He needed to hear Seth's approval- he probably knew Jess better then a second's worth of discussion that Ryan had.

"Together? I don't know you. You know me for the rumours you hear. How can we possibly be any good 'together'?" Ryan asked her in disbelief. He couldn't quite comprehend why this stranger, Jess was suddenly so interested in him.

"We've got a lot of things in common, Ryan. Sooner or later, you'll find out." Jess smirked, and she turned on her heel, walking away mysteriously. Ryan tried to shake the thought of Jess away, when Seth approached.

"You were just talking to Jess." Seth said, in disgust. He knew nothing good washed in around Jess. She was a crummy imitation of a mafia member- always loaded and ready to kill her next victim brutally.

"I was hoping I'd hear your point of view when I told you she asked me out." Ryan said quietly.

"Run!" Seth shrieked in a completely opposite tone of voice. "Run faster then a freaking jet. If you get with this girl, your world will go out of control. All I have to say is run, man, RUN!" Seth gulped, "Run while you can, or I'll loose a good one."

"Why are you so beefed with this girl?" Ryan asked.

"Because everyone is." Seth then replied as if Ryan had just asked a very stupid question. Ironically, the two seemed to walk right passed Jess' locker, where she stood. When she looked at Ryan, she winked and she walked up to him- cuddling endearingly.

"Have you made up your mind?" Jess put on the sweetest puppy dog eyes, as she smiled gently studying Ryan's face. Seth glared at Jess, who was always in to screw someone over.

"Actually, yes." Ryan smiled quickly at her, when he noticed her hopeful eyes. When he was about to say no, his mind decided for him- it forfeited, showed the white flag, "I will go out with you." Ryan's eyes widened when he realised what he just said. He didn't want to say it. How did he manage to say it? Was something seriously messed up inside of him, already?

"Ryan, that's great." Jess said as she smiled. Seth was so shocked he almost fell over, multiple times. Jess hugged Ryan and she flipped out a piece of paper from her pocket, "You have a pen?" She asked.

"Yeah, uh, hold on." Ryan felt around in his pockets for a pen, when he finally found it he quivered but tried to hide it. What had he gotten himself into? Once he supplied her with a pen, she scribbled down her e-mail address, and phone number. "Call me." She said before taking off.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

* * *

"Ryan, I am now forced to never talk to you again," Seth said as if horrified, "I am now forced to dissect you in your sleep. You cannot live with Jess intertwined in your life. One day, you will be thanking me- of course being dead and all." Seth's face turned a light, pale colour of a bony white. Ryan couldn't understand what he did wrong. "What about Marissa you idiotic idiot?" Seth questioned forcefully.

"I'm with Jess." Ryan shrugged as he stumbled passed Seth, and pushed against his shoulder.

"God, I really do not know you. I never knew you." Seth said as he stalked off in the other direction. Marissa then approached him curiously. She looked at his harsh face, and she tried to seem relaxed- however after seeing Jess and Ryan together, it scared her more then anything.

"Seth, what's going on?" Marissa asked as if she knew Seth for her whole life- and also talked to him since forever. Seth just gave her a look – something like, 'you're only talking to me because you want to know something'. Marissa understood the look, but expected an answer just the same. "Come on. It'll be easier to talk outside, okay?" Marissa suggested hopefully.

"Yeah, whatever." Seth replied as he walked coolly out the school doors. Marissa led him to a nicely shaded tree, where emptiness resided. She smiled as she pointed to the serene place. Seth followed where her thing fingers pointed. He felt awkward walking with the most popular girl in school- it just didn't feel right walking with Marissa Cooper. Marissa then sat down with poise, as she crossed her legs in anticipation. She couldn't wait to hear what Seth had to say.

"Seth, can you please tell me now?" Marissa asked.

"I don't know. I don't think I'd be loyal to my ex-friend." Seth said almost dismissively- but considering that Jess had now bombarded their lives, he couldn't consider it more.

"Ex-friend? What's going on with you and Ryan?" Marissa asked eloquently.

"He's with someone. Someone I'm not too fond of." Marissa's jaw dropped about three meters, as she silently prayed it weren't true. She swallowed but her jaw immediately fell back down again. Marissa's eyes were wide, as if she were waiting for Seth to say he was joking. "Marissa, if I said I were joking, I'd be lying." Seth said, while unintentionally reading her very expressive thoughts.

"Ryan's," Marissa paused trying to soothe her stirring emotions, "Ryan's with," Marissa couldn't spit out the words, because she was so shocked. She gulped, "with Jess? Ryan's with Jess?" Marissa said in a tone that begged Seth to say otherwise. He nodded as he was afraid Marissa would hit him to release her shock. Seth didn't know what to do when he saw Marissa's eyes well up with tears- her usually flawless face swelling with colour. Seth went to hug Marissa, and yet she completely misunderstood this friendly gesture. While Seth only wanted to comfort Marissa, she wanted to comfort her longing.

She closed her eyes and went to kiss Seth- misinterpreting the fact that he was only going to hug her. After a second of acceptance, Seth finally resisted the kiss, leaving Marissa with her eyes closed slowly backing away. When she realised what she just did, she buried her hands in her face, and she started to cry harder.

"What have I done? Oh God," Marissa shrieked, but her voice was muffled through her hands. Seth touched her back and started to comfort her, in spite of his fright toward Marissa. Marissa wailed and when her sensations finally remarked that Seth was comforting her she stared at him, and leaned in again to kiss Seth. She wrapped her hands around him, and he naively did not oppose.

"What the hell is this?" Ryan asked as he towered over Seth and Marissa. Marissa instinctively pulled away, and she looked at Ryan, with little Jess hand-in-hand. Marissa glared at the smirking blonde, and she got up and walked away. She left Seth to deal with Ryan all alone.

"So what is this? The minute Marissa is completely available you're onto her?" Ryan asked, grimacing.

"It's not like that." Seth said before he was pinned against the tree, his face turning blue from the force Ryan used against him.

"Stay away from Marissa, Cohen." Ryan said gravely, but he was interrupted by a shrieking Marissa and Summer.

"Stop! What are you doing?" Summer came on Seth's defence. Because Ryan wasn't responding to her shriek, she ran up straight from behind and she punched Ryan in the back as hard as she possibly could. His reflexes allowed him to turn around and let Seth drop from the altitude he hung on. "Who the hell do you think you are, little Atwood boy? Now you really think you can play with Marissa's heart? Well here's news for you. Hang out with that whore Jess, then you might even end up like your parents." Summer scowled, as she tore Seth away from the crowd, and nodded toward Marissa to follow.

"I'm sorry Seth." Marissa said when they were a safe distance away. Seth tried to ignore her, but he only managed to nod. "Look Seth, I'm sorry. I don't kiss guys like that everyday. I'm so sorry." Marissa said with genuine guilt.

"Ew. You kissed Cohen? Why did you conveniently miss that when you were saying that Cohen was getting beat up?" Summer asked, her eyes cold with disbelief. Marissa smiled quickly at Seth, who was completely speechless.

"It was urgent. I needed your help- you helped. Now you know." Marissa replied briefly.

"Marissa," Seth finally cut it, "You're an awesome girl, possibly a great friend too- but that's all you and I both want. Promise me you won't get caught up in the moment again, whether it's now, or with someone else?" Seth said in a silent whisper. Marissa looked at Seth, full of thought. She looked at him, realising he would never be more then a friend- she looked at him like a helpful older brother that protected her.

"Thanks Seth. It means a lot to me that you care- I promise you I won't." Marissa said. Summer looked at Marissa's zoned eyes, and she almost questioned the fact that she was still talking to Seth Cohen. Summer looked from Marissa to Seth- she figured Seth was decent considering Marissa was talking to him. Summer smiled as she shifted trying to point some attention to herself. She couldn't stand being just a bystander.

"What's the matter Summer?" Seth quickly asked, worrying for this girl he actually didn't know at all.

"Just a little cold." Summer squeaked out quietly, as she smiled quickly urging the conversation to go on now that the two realised she was still there.

"Summer, it's 37°C out here!" Marissa pointed out. She smiled knowing Summer only wanted the attention she deserved. Summer laughed out loud, seeing that Marissa picked up the point of the comment. Summer shrugged.

"You know, we should do something together. Talk, chat, gossip?" Summer offered looking at Marissa and Seth- particularly at Seth bearing in mind that Summer already hung out with Marissa. Seth looked at Summer- stunned.

"I don't know. I'm not really into the chick stuff…" Seth tried to seem cool about it, but his glowing face made his excitement completely obvious.

"Come on Cohen. It'll be fun." Summer persuaded him further.

"Ah, I dunno," Seth said, but with one last gaze at Summer's flawless beauty, he could pretend no longer, "Okay. That'd be great. Listen ladies, I gotta go. Talk to you later?" They both nodded. Seth parted the little group excitedly. Marissa looked at Summer, who was still smiling long after Seth left. Marissa tried not to look worried, but her face showed it all.

"You don't have a thing for him, do you?" Marissa asked in an over-protective manner. Summer froze; her smile rapidly vanished from her tanned face. Summer then laughed out loud acting as if it were a joke, however inside she was getting nauseous. Her smile was uncertain and quivery, but Marissa was too full of thought to notice, as she watched far beyond Summer, toward a familiar face with another sneaky, over-familiar girl. Jess and Ryan.

"Are you kidding? It's Cohen. But it would be a nice change to hate one person less." Summer said casually on her defence. She wished her stomach would quit churning, and her heart stop pounding so mercilessly. Marissa then looked back at Summer.

"Right." She nodded quickly, and continued to look over at the two. She wondered if they were paid to make out so much after what- the first hour of being 'together'?

"What are you staring at Coop?" Summer looked over at the mingling couple, and she merely punched Marissa (lightly) on the shoulder. Marissa quickly reacted with an uncalled for 'ow'. Marissa rubbed the place where Summer had playfully hit her. "Marissa, get over him! He's out with Jess- does that not mean anything to you?" Summer asked quickly, glaring at her best friend.

"Summer, have you ever been in love?" Summer winced in pain, as she stared blankly at her friend. Marissa knew 'love' was a difficult topic for Summer to bear, but Summer shook her head slowly. "Have you ever watched someone so close, be so far?" Summer swallowed, and looking up with a frown she shook her head once more, "That's right, Sum. You get everyone you want. This guy, I want- but even if I were you, I wouldn't get him because he's deeper then that. He's deeper then I'll ever know. He's out of my reach, and I can't help it because I'm a popular, shallow, bitch- and he knows it, I know it, you know it, everyone knows it, but they deny it. Because they're afraid of me, they deny it. They think I'm powerful, ruthless, and I would kill for status- I'm far from it. It's the picture I portray though, and it's what I am. I've learned to be this different trivial person, but inside I'm not her, and I don't want to be her but I can't change. Summer you'll never understand this longing for a guy because damn it; you can get anyone for a week, a day, a long-term relationship and yet you'll always be the one to break it off. You're the girl that can get anything she wants. You've never felt what I feel. This feeling would kill you- shatter your pride. I just wish he could see the real me, and see that I'm not who people think I am. I wish I could appeal to him, and let him know through one word who I am. I wish he would listen to my silent calls- see my blind affection. Summer, why can't I be me long enough to stay me?"


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

* * *

Ryan wondered about the high school morality and its total obliviousness to real life. As he held the little blonde in his arms, leaning on the tree the two gazed at the empty field with people occasionally walking through it. Ryan was deep in thought as he folded his hands neatly on Jess' perfectly built stomach. Jess' breath was steady, and even though Ryan didn't notice, she was smiling.

"I'm lucky." Jess finally said, breaking the silence with a soft voice. Ryan tried not to seem surprised, but he carefully shifted with his girlfriend in his lap. Girlfriend. It seemed so peculiar to him, so foreign. He almost laughed as he repeated it to himself in his mind numerous times.

"Why are you lucky?" Ryan asked answering Jess' yearning for him to ask. She wasn't at all explicit in why she was so lucky, and she was surprised that Ryan didn't wonder sooner.

"Ever since you came to this school, you've been the catch of the day. You're all girls talk about- Ryan Atwood this, that. I can't believe I snatched such a hottie all for myself. It kind of makes me want to change?" Jess almost asked as she raised her eyebrows. Ryan couldn't see her face which made him queasy as the face held all answers to all mysteries.

"Why do you have a rep of a bad girl?" Ryan asked carefully.

"Why do you?" Jess asked defensively.

"I asked you first." Ryan smiled as he held her tighter.

"I've been involved in a few things- no biggies. Your turn?"

"Same here." Ryan replied casually, not wanting to bring up his past- his future laid in Newport, and he couldn't change that anymore.

Ryan exhaled doubtfully, and Jess felt the tension. She escaped his strong arms, and instead she turned to face him. She sat cross-legged across from him, and smiled telling him it was okay to talk one on one.

"What is our being together worth?" Ryan asked, unintentionally hurting Jess- although she didn't show it. To Ryan, it was better said in his head rather then out loud, so he felt awkward when he got a reply. Ryan glanced over to a sudden rustle in a bush, so he could accentuate his uncomfortable feeling toward the situation. Jess touched his hand, but quickly pulled away when she felt the discomfort steaming in and about. Jess rolled her eyes.

"Are you in it for love or are you in it for pleasure?" Jess looked at Ryan anxiously, hoping he would answer what she would answer. Ryan thought for a minute, but the answer he was to give would certainly gain a laugh or two, from Jess.

"Love." Ryan replied frankly, not caring if Jess would mock him. Jess smiled, but it disappeared in a second's time. Instead she replaced it with an unfathomable look, that Ryan could not explain.

"Then we're in it for two different reasons." Jess said.

"Should we end it now, or end it when we loathe each other completely?" Ryan asked, almost knowing the answer he was to receive.

"I want to be friends. So, I guess it's over." Jess said, and with a nod she stood up and sauntered off. Ryan sat leaning against the tree, returning to his earlier thought: what was it all worth?

Ryan thought about Marissa- how she had different things on her mind.

Ryan thought about Seth- how he had hurt him on behalf of the girl that he hurt in the first place.

Ryan thought about Jess- how he would never know her girlfriend-wise again.

Ryan thought about himself, and yet he couldn't explain anything.

Before he came to Newport, he was just a guy infected with crime, hate and cruelty. He could no longer see himself poisoned with the love of crime- he no longer felt the rush. He didn't feel so dependant on doing wrong. It's as if he changed his life around, but by doing so he was inching the people he should love away from him. Ryan got up lazily, but when he smelt a scent of a beautiful girl sit next to him, he decided to stay sitting. He didn't dare look at the individual sitting next to him- he could only recognize her faint breathing, and proverbial boldness. There was only one girl capable of it all.

The girl sighed, which clarified Ryan's doubts- he knew it was Marissa, but still he did not want to look at her. He had hurt her too bad, even though he wasn't with Jess anymore. Marissa was so immaculate, and he scarred her delicate, fragile pride by throwing her away.

"The line I practised to open up with now seems too corny to even think about. So I'm speechless." Marissa said still gazing far ahead of her. She closed her eyes- it seemed that with her eyes closed, her pain would be indistinguishable. "I don't know what else to say, other then you have the wrong reputation for the wrong girl. I'm not who you think I am, Ryan. I may seem that way, but you out of all people should know that looks are deceiving. I know you're deeper then me- I know you probably won't give me the faintest chance now that you're with Jess," Ryan quickly interrupted Marissa.

"I'm not with her." Ryan said, and after saying this he soothed Marissa's intense jealousy. "Anymore." Ryan added, so Marissa wouldn't think of him a hypocrite.

"I'm usually so good with guys- I can say a mouthful of meaningless words, and they'll all buy it. With you, I'm afraid that the very little I think of to say will sound tremendously stupid. You already think of me as a slut, a whore, a btch- and I know because of the way you, and everyone else in this damned school look at me. Except I wish you'd give me a chance to show you the real Marissa Cooper. I wish you'd give me this one damn shot to show you the rumours aren't real. But you're so distant. You're one thing on the universe that I can't have, and it kills me to think that I might never have you either. God, what the hell am I doing here, talking to you like this. Just," Marissa paused not knowing how to go on, "Just forget it. I wasn't here. I didn't talk to you. I didn't kiss Seth because I wished it was you. Just forget it. Forget me, forget I ever saw you. Bet that won't be too hard, eh?" Marissa smiled quickly, trying to shake off the tear that travelled down her face. Marissa went to get up, but Ryan took her hand gently, and pulled her back down so he could say his own mouthful.

"Marissa, I don't know if I'm ready for you." This was all Ryan could muster, as he could see a few tears brim Marissa's subtle eyes. She smiled a very quick smile, and then she closed her eyes so Ryan could understand how much pain she was in.

"You know, that's okay." Marissa said daintily. She chortled a juicy yet careless laugh, "What's love worth anyways?" Marissa pressed her lips together, smudging the little lip-gloss. Ryan understood that Marissa was trying to cover up her strengthened melancholy. Ryan wished she wouldn't go- he willed her to stay so they could stare at each others' endlessness. But Marissa's heart cringed every time she had to look Ryan in the eyes. Her legs would deaden every time she imagined Ryan's careful touch. Marissa was overwhelmed with the severe thing called 'love' that only generated problems in her serene life.

"I'm sorry." Marissa breathed as she walked away still facing Ryan. She closed her eyes, and turned around. She started dashing away from the tree that Ryan was so comfortable at. Marissa ran to the middle of nowhere- apparently, a growth of bushes, trees, where she could let her sentiments flee.

Meanwhile, Ryan's cell phone started to ring incessantly- he was forced to interrupt his one moment where he could ponder, by picking it up. The annoyance was unmistakable in his voice when he answered the phone.

"Hello?" Ryan groaned.

"I'm assuming I have you to blame." Teresa's mother said forcefully into the phone. Ryan looked around unnecessarily, knowing she would not be around- however he was almost too confused to speak.

"Pardon me?" Ryan tried to ask politely, although the way he replied seemed very brutal and washed with attitude.

"My daughter's attempted suicide. I owe it to you?" Teresa's mother spoke in fragments, yet Ryan still could not put the puzzle pieces together. He hoped that phrase by phrase, he would learn more.

"What?" Ryan asked with perplexity cramming his voice.

"God, you're slow," Teresa's mother said coldly, "My daughter- Teresa. She overdosed; trying to commit suicide. She's alive- thank God. Your breaking up with her made her take the pills one after the other. She left a very brief note stating yadayada how much she loves me, her family, and how she loves her ex-boyfriend Ryan despite his breaking up with her. I was shocked, but at the same time I had a motive for her relentless actions." Teresa's mother spoke fiercely, and coldly as if Ryan were the one shoving the pills down Teresa's throat.

"I'm so sorry, but even my sympathy will not change it," Ryan started, questioning the severity in what used to be, someone very close's voice, "I did love Teresa with all my heart- I can not deny it. But the spark washed away, and I couldn't stand to keep her hopes up through a long distance relationship. I figured the more we denied the fact that it would not work, the harder the fall would be in the end. I'm sorry. I guess change is bitter in one way, sweet in the next." Ryan tried to seem candidly apologetic, but even that would not cover up his worry.

"Speaking of which. I called your household, and your mother said you were nowhere to be seen. I believe she was drunk then, so I didn't know if she was wasted or telling the truth. Guess the rumours are true then?" She asked contemptibly.

"I'm sorry to say, but yes. It is true. I no longer reside in Chino." Ryan attempted to seem sophisticated, but it was no use.

"Just cause you're a rich boy now, Ryan, doesn't mean you're someone you're not. Drop the 'I'm-better-then-you' and talk to me like you used to. For God's sake, I can hardly believe you go to some rich private school, with a rich girlfriend, a rich life, blah blah freaking blah. You're just going to leave your past?" Ryan imagined if he were having this conversation one-on-one with this appalling woman, her face would be an angry, pale white, her fists clenched and her body tense. He could not believe he once knew her as a calm, kind lady.

"I'm just trying to make this easier, for me and you to see that I'm different now. No matter how much I try I can't imagine life, like at Chino anymore."

"Because you've seen the better life. Once you're there, you can't go back- right?" Teresa's mother interrupted wickedly.

"Wrong. I can go back to Chino whenever I want to, BUT," Ryan said quickly so he wouldn't be interrupted, "I don't want to make it harder for those I left behind." Ryan said, "I'm sorry, but I really have to go. I'll come by to visit Teresa sometime; I really hope she's okay. I'm sorry, again."

"Speaking of which, Ryan Atwood," Her voice tensioned even more then it already was. "I want you to never speak to my daughter, Teresa, again. If you do, I am afraid I will have to bring the law into the situation. If you love her at all, you'll let her live. You know, suicide isn't a matter to toy with. Therefore, do not call her, speak to her, or meet with her any longer. You've done your share- which was more then enough. Let Teresa forget about you. Let her get over it." Teresa's mother said finally, before hanging up lucidly. Ryan followed her lead as he, too hung up.

Ryan was about to name this tree, upon which he leaned on, 'The Tree of Hell'. When he came to just think, he would be swamped with trouble- examples, him and Jess breaking up, Marissa and him talking about well 'love', him finding out about Teresa and her attempted suicide. This tree was overwhelming. This tree made life seem miserable, the life it gave. Ryan sighed, and he closed his eyes. Then he heard footsteps nearing, and someone coming to sit beside him- beside the Tree of Hell.

"I want to know what you feel towards Marissa, and why you're playing with her so bad. Because unless you haven't yet noticed, love isn't a game, and if you think that, you're an idiot." Seth said solemnly, afraid that Ryan would tackle him. Ryan could tell that these lines were well trained.

"She's a girl. Not necessarily 'the' girl. I don't know why I attacked you so bad back there. I'm sorry. It shouldn't have happened. I know what I'm doing to this girl is sht but I can't help it if I just don't feel right around her." Ryan replied sombrely.

"This isn't like marriage Ryan. You go out with a girl to see if it's the right thing. How will you ever know if you don't just freaking try?" Seth finally suggested. Ryan figured this was the first good thing that happened around the Tree of Hell. Ryan finally had a light bulb moment…


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

* * *

"Marissa, will you go out with me?" Ryan flashed himself a quick smile- actually his reflection, as he groomed himself before walked over to Marissa's house and asking her out. He didn't bother with the formal gift, but he wanted to have the actual asking her out downright practised. He figured it out, with the help of his nifty sidekick, Seth. Dating wasn't a commitment- it was a time to get to know the partner. 

Ryan left the pool house carefully closing the door. He crossed the lawn, and walked over towards the front door. He knocked politely, but with no reply he decided to ring the doorbell. Marissa came out, dressed in a miniskirt and a white halter-top. She gazed at Ryan, as if saying 'what-are-you-doing-here?' through her tedious glare. Ryan smiled, and Marissa closed the front door as she walked in front of it. They stood under the night sky, and the breeze ruffled their hair.

"Marissa," Ryan paused, "Will you," Ryan tried to let the words leave his mouth, but it's as if they were afraid. He managed to somehow continue, "Will you go out with me?" Ryan asked. Those words must have been the hardest things he had ever said in his life. He looked at Marissa's face, but he couldn't tell if she was flattered, in love, confused, shocker…

"You don't mean that." Marissa finally said, impervious.

"I mean it with my heart and soul." Ryan said touching her hands with the tips of his fingers. He stared into her eyes, hoping that she would accept.

"No, you don't mean that." Marissa insisted deprecatingly.

"Yes I really do." Ryan repeated.

"Why now?" Marissa asked, now her face had irrelevant worry all over it.

"Because, the time was right." Ryan said slowly, unsure of how the situation was blooming.

"Well obviously your timing could not be worse, Ryan!" Marissa shrieked.

"What?" Ryan asked quietly, over Marissa's booming voice. She grasped her forehead.

"I'm going out with someone. I'm going out with Zack. He asked me out. I'm sorry Ryan. You waited too long." Marissa gulped, and she entered her house again. She closed the door as she looked pitifully at Ryan. Ryan stood in the now, not pleasant but frigid breeze that overshadowed the bashful evening. Ryan draped his hands in his pockets, as he sagged along the driveway, down the lawn, entering his pool house room in silence.

Soon Seth came wallowing in also, searching for consolation in Ryan. He sat down right beside Ryan, as he shifted his hands in his pockets. Seth shrugged and exhaled. Seth just contemplated in the darkness for a little while, allowing Ryan to do the same.

"What's up?" Ryan asked fitfully, as if it were a question he just had to ask.

"Well. I don't know. I'm beat. I don't know how to deal with Sum and her associate- Marissa. They want to 'bond' but I don't know if they mean it or if they just want to see how much of a booger I am." Seth laughed quietly to himself, hoping this wasn't just a plan to make him less popular- he was already lower then the general low.

"You have a chance to hang with the ladies and you're worried?" Ryan smiled at Seth, "For what it's worth, I think that they'll take you down faster then you can say help." Ryan added.

"What? Thanks for that. I feel so much better." Seth growled sarcastically. "What's up with you?" Seth asked quickly.

"I finally asked Marissa out," Ryan gave Seth a second to gasp in utter shock, "But,"

"But…" Seth repeated hoping Ryan would continue faster.

"She's going out with Zack." Ryan said, showing his sadness. Seth looked at him empathetically, and then spoke.

"It's like she wanted to kill your pride. Maybe she's aware of how hard it is for a guy to ask a girl out." Seth said, not helping Ryan whatsoever. Ryan nodded, as he looked deep into the wall hoping it would move, or shiver under his gaze so he could change the subject. He sighed, as he compared his and Seth's situations. He wanted to hang with Marissa, and he couldn't. Seth got to hang with Marissa, but he's afraid. Ryan laughed to himself, as he realised how different him and Seth really were.

"I gotta go." Ryan said suddenly, getting up from the poolhouse.

"Where are you going?" Seth asked quickly, realising that this was Ryan's room.

"Don't worry about it." Ryan mumbled quickly, as he escaped the room.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

* * *

"Ryan, please don't do anything stupid!" Seth called out as he gripped Ryan's shoulder tightly. Ryan looked at Seth gravely, and decided to back down. He went to the couch, and he tumbled down to a sitting position. He looked at Seth, pleading him to understand and give him some slack. "Hey, man, don't worry." Seth said calmly. He didn't try to comfort Ryan the manly way, saying she was worthless, etc. etc. Seth knew Ryan would not tolerate it. "Your day will come- you guys will be together." Seth commented. It made Ryan smirk.

"It's the first reassuring thing you've said to me since my arrival," Ryan chortled, "Thanks." His voice hardened, as he continued to grieve. Seconds later, Ryan and Seth heard a faint knocking on the pool house door. Ryan looked up hopefully, when Seth went to open it. Ryan tried not to smile when he saw Marissa come through the door, and he succeeded. He kept his tense, hurt face on as clearly as he could manage so that Marissa would see the pain she caused him.

"Ryan," Marissa smiled softly, as she said in a desperate tone. She gulped as she nodded toward Seth. She realised they had been talking- possibly about her subject. She was prone to guilt, as she invited herself in quickly. She shuffled in, and she sat down beside Ryan. "It took me a while to conjure up the guts to get here. It took me a while to practise my lines enough to lie to you. But you know, you're kinda irresistible. No matter how hard-to-get I try and play, it's impossible with you. Cause I want to be with you. I'm sorry Ryan. I'm sorry for lying, and I know you probably think I'm a pathetic loser that lied for the one thing I insisted on, but I can't help it. You were such an excellent player, I couldn't help but seek revenge. Ryan, please. Is the offer still open?" Ryan nodded, his face secluded but grave.

"You lied?" Marissa looked at Ryan's face, as she yearned for it to smile and enlighten. But it didn't. Marissa nodded slowly and delicately, watching Ryan's face scrupulously. "I'm not sure." Marissa's buoyant face was warped with discontent.

"You don't mean that," Marissa started to shake her head, "You and I both want this. Why can't you put aside your pride for like three seconds?" Marissa tore her eyes away from Ryan, looking towards Seth who was gazing blankly at the situation. Marissa desperately looked at him, hoping he would kick in like an active sidekick.

"Marissa, we can't base our relationship on lies." Ryan said glumly after a second's time.

"Ryan, it was a white lie to tell you that two can play your game." Marissa said viciously.

"Game? Is that all this is to you?" Ryan said a little superficially.

"Ryan, why are you being so drama-queen? Why are you like a little emotional girl that actually cares about the love bull sht? Grow up, Ryan! You should know by now that no high school couples end up together no matter how hard they try. You should know that the only reason people go out in high school is infatuation, and the urge to make-out. You should know that. And I'm sorry if I burst your 'I'm-a-love-sick-romantic-fool' bubble, but someone has GOT to tell you the damn truth!" By this time, Marissa was on her feet frantically shrieking things to Ryan, who was abnormally silent. Marissa exhaled, as if a huge burden was lifted off her shoulders, "Ryan," Marissa said almost silently, as she fought back tears, "Say something." Marissa begged, regretting her hurtful words. Marissa looked away, as she bit her lip. She wished that the tears would stop filling up her eyes, blurring her vision until she let them go. Marissa laughed out dismissively, through tears that were now voluntarily trailing down her cheeks- she smiled, "You know what, say nothing you f ucking son of a btch. I love you, and I don't give a sht if it means nothing, or something to you. Please, spare me the trouble- never speak to me again." Marissa started to cry as her heart ached. She saw Ryan look up at her. He stood up slowly, making Marissa a little squeamish, but her heart raced rapidly. Ryan looked into Marissa's eyes, and he brushed away the strand of hair that was draped over her cheek. She stopped crying yet she only looked at Ryan, wide-eyed.

"Drama queen." Ryan smiled as he looked at Marissa's tear soaked face. She laughed as she sniffled. Marissa wiped her face gently, absolving it from tears. Seth smiled to himself as he watched the two- love-struck.

"Is the offer still open?" Marissa breathed silently.

"Hell yes." Ryan said as he embraced the lanky brunette in his arms, and delicate kiss. Marissa wrapped her hands around Ryan's neck, as she kissed him back faithfully. When the two pulled away, Marissa whispered quietly.

"Finally."


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen

* * *

**

"I'm going to leave." Seth nodded, as the two didn't even turn to look at him. Seth led himself out the door, shutting it almost silently behind him. Even though the sound was almost thunderous, Marissa and Ryan were too absorbed in the moment to hear anything.

Ryan gazed at Marissa, as her eye lashes touched her cheek gently, and her lips curled into a soft smile. Why hadn't Ryan realised that Marissa was there all along? Why had he reminisced with the school's biggest bad girl, crawling into the distasteful temptations? Jess seemed to be like an open offer- for some reason, Ryan was not intimidated by this girl, and yet Marissa, even at this moment sent chills down his spine. Why did this particular girl do that to him? Why didn't Jess? Why are girls so complicated- Ryan thought, right then and there, as he continued to stare at Marissa's innocent, and longing smile.

"Did you mean what you said before?" Ryan asked in a curious whisper, not knowing what reply he wanted in turn. At the moment, he didn't care, because in the deepest part of his gut, he knew it was true, but in his heart he hoped it wasn't. Ryan felt so childish around Marissa- his insides got all warm and mushy, his phrases seemed desperate and juvenile, and the way he stared at her was probably more than frightening. All his actions could not be stopped- it was just something about this girl that made Ryan tick like a bomb ready to explode in the midst of nowhere.

"In a way, I did, Ryan. It's the rational truth, but there _are _some exceptions, and both of us know that." Marissa blinked carefully, wishing she didn't say all those cruel things. Sure, they were true at the moment of fleeting anger and frustration, but now, when it was peaceful and serene, love had a totally new outlook, "Can we just completely forget what I said in the last five minutes?" Marissa asked quietly, enveloping her whole body in the mysterious moment, "I guess I just say the most idiotic things when I'm around you, and the worst part is, that I can't help it eitherway." Marissa grinned, as she stared at Ryan.


	18. Chapter 18

_(Author's Note : I haven't updated this fan fiction since.. WOW, since June: Okay, well, thanks for the reviews ) So awesome! That's partly why I'm updating.. otherwise, I wouldn't update for another LOOOONG while. Keep updating! Thanks!)_

**Chapter Eighteen

* * *

**

Marissa pulled away from the kiss, as she smiled intently at Ryan, the slightly taller boy- his sharp features staring back warmly at her, "God, I would have never thought this would happen…" She said, intrigued, as she giggled, "Hold on, it might not have registered yet.. but did you just kiss me?" She beamed deeply.

"I might've." Ryan whispered, as he stared into her eyes.

"Well then, _wow._" She grinned, and after a moment's worth of beautiful silence, she looked up at him hopefully, "So does this mean we're officially-"

"Boyfriend and girlfriend, I hope." Ryan finished her sentence, so he could spare her the awkwardness. Marissa's face lit up violently, and Ryan could tell by her glistening teeth, and her precious smile that she was happier than she had ever been, "I'm such an idiot for wanting to believe that we weren't completely meant to be." Ryan said honestly.

"Meant to be?" Marissa quoted, "So you think it's fate, huh?" Marissa sighed, "-_Love at first sight?_" She smiled gently,

"Gotta admit, Marissa, I think your little theories are rubbing off on me." Ryan said slowly.

"Already?" She asked, her eyes warped in shock, "_Usually _boyfriends and girlfriends change each other within the, mmm, middle range of their relationship- Guess it must be fate then." She agreed, as she kissed him softly. This time, she didn't have to do anything, because Ryan tormented her mouth open with his tongue, as he sweltered her mouth with slow, and tickling motions.

Marissa soon pulled away, grinning, "I have a feeling, that with you, all I'm going to be saying is- _Wow._" She frowned, "And usually, guys are the ones that are supposed to boost the _girl's _ego, not the opposite!" She giggled a harmonious laugh, and Ryan laughed with her.

"You seem to know a lot about relationships- a lot of statistics." He corrected himself, with a grin.

"Well yeah, cause you know, I've been in so many successful relationship, I could write a book." She said sarcastically, as she chuckled again.

"Well I'm glad I have the privilege to be _tutored _by such an _experienced_ beautiful, girl." He complimented her.

"Coop was supposed to be here twenty minutes ago." Summer said, her fingers tapping violently against her wooden cabinet, "And if _she's _not here, that would really make it seem like _we're _hanging out." She looked troubled, "And we're _not_." She added hoarsely, "Where are you Coop?"

Seth didn't bother telling Summer that Marissa was with Ryan- for the time being, he loved seeing Summer so worked up.

"Sit." She hissed, pointing to her bed, "And don't get _any _dirty thoughts, Cohen." Summer glared at him. Seth laughed, however she didn't find anything amusing, "Why are you laughing?"

Seth contemplated it for a second, "Cause you know my name." She stared at him awkwardly.

"I know _everyone's _name. Even the geeky geeks." She said nodding, looking away, as she opened her mouth to say something. Instead, she closed it again and raised an eyebrow, "So you're _shocked _that I know your name? Am I supposed be flattered?" She started in an unwavering tone.

Seth gazed at her. If Summer had strictly prohibited any '_dirty thoughts´_ it would have been best to sit him on the floor- however even their, Seth was turned on by the fact that he was _in _Summer Robert's house, Summer Robert's _room. _He tried to hide the smirk on his face, as he imagined a whole splotch of thoughts, "Flattered? Perhaps." He said sophisticatedly.

Summer continued to stare at him, not knowing what she was so intrigued by, "You know what?" Seth nodded, wondering with a smile what she would say, "I gotta call Coop." She said quickly, and Seth's face sunk. Summer giggled when she saw it, "What did you expect? … It wasn't supposed to be just me and you." She said raising an eyebrow.

"Naw, nothing." Seth said with a stern smile- _Just hoping for something I'll never have, _he thought.

Summer squinted her eyes, as if trying to understand the boy that sat so awkwardly on her bed, "I wish I knew what you were thinking right now." Summer said softly, as she pulled out her phone.

"I wish you didn't." He whispered, but she was already too busy chatting with Marissa.

"Coop! Where the hell are you? You're late! You're making _me _bond with _Cohen_." She practically slapped Seth in the face. He closed his eyes, and soon recovered.

"Sorry, Sum. _Something _came up." Marissa said gently, smiling at Ryan, "I don't think I can make it…" She said slowly, as she pressed her lips quietly on top of Ryan's- she couldn't resist the temptation.

"_Ew. _You just made out- with Ryan?" She added, perplexed, "When did this happen, biatch? And why wasn't I the first to know?" She glared far ahead of her.

"Cause, it was kind of sudden. Seth could have told you though!" Marissa squealed on her defense. Summer turned her head slowly toward Cohen.

"OK, I'll call you back… bye." She snapped her phone closed, as she glared at Seth consecutively. Seth shrugged, and put on a clumsy smile, and Summer almost pounced on him- but she didn't, because she _knew _he would take it the wrong way, "Why did you just _forget _about telling me about Ryan and Marissa?" Summer scowled harshly.

"Er… well, I guess I forgot." He paused. His face looked enlightened, "I have for you!" He said excitedly, "Why did you and Marissa want to befriend me all of a sudden?"


	19. Chapter 19

(Author's note; _Yes, guys; this is the only way I can really communicate with you all… communicate, thank you for your reviews and all that. So again, thanks for the kind reviews. Keep them UPPPP :) pleasseee. I'll only continue writing, if I get at least a few per chapter. Thanks again! S2)_

**Chapter Nineteen

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**

"You forgot?" Summer hissed, "How convenient, no?" Her voice seemed paralyzed with a certain indescribable anger. Seth couldn't help but smiled ; she looked so cute when she was pissed off. She glared at him coldly, "Okay, I honestly _don't _want to know what you're thinking _now._" Her voice chimed almost melodically. Seth was gazing at her intrigued, and it was honestly, creeping Summer out, "Cohen!" Finally Seth awoke, from the sudden yelp, his eyes wide and alert, "Stop staring at me, Cohen…" She whimpered in a whiny voice, as she turned around to face her computer, signing on to her instant messenger.

"So, what am I supposed to do?" Seth asked, as he stared at the back of Summer's glistening hair. Summer rolled her eyes, but Seth couldn't see it.

"Isn't being in _my _room just enough of a pleasure?" She giggled to herself, and Seth realized it was the truth. Summer looked at him deviously, "Amuse yourself- pants _on." _She muttered in a way, that made Seth melt in his seat. She really thought he was perverted in his own way. Seth stared at her, his face blank and shocked. Summer raised an eyebrow, "Kidding." She nodded, "If you're going to follow me around, you might as well note when I kid around." She mumbled. Seth was shocked by this as well,

"Whaaat?" He asked, utterly confused, "I follow you around? So what that's the point of my hanging out with you and Marissa? So you can humiliate me further, and tell people I _follow you around?_" Seth glared at her seamlessly, as he shook his head, "All this time, I thought you had a pretty attractive personality… but really, you're quite the bitch to begin with." Seth started, "Please note, if you're going to _invite me to hang out with you, _just don't." Seth got up, from her bed, as he went to the door and walked out as awkwardly as he came in.

Summer revered the silence, but inside she felt empty. She ignored the thought, as she continued to instant message a few of her friends, ignoring many on the list. Once Summer was through with the computer, she turned away and flicked on the television screen, but nothing seemed to soothe her boredom. She had an inexplicable feeling in the pit of her stomach, that wasn't there when Seth sat so preciously on her bed. She gulped down, as she shooed the though away as quickly as it came.

Marissa sat cuddled in Ryan's shoulder, as she concentrated on the movie that was flickering out of the television screen. Actually, she wasn't concentrating much on the movie, rather on how right it felt being settled with Ryan. She turned to face him, with a smile, "Kiss me." She muttered.

"Now?" He asked, surprised in the entirety.

"Yes now, you fool, kiss me." She said, and then added, "I'm bored…" She giggled, and soon Ryan's lips were on hers. She cherished the immaculate feeling, but soon it was gone, when he pulled away. Marissa pouted, and Ryan only grinned,

"There." He said, his eyes showing obvious fulfillment. Marissa rolled her eyes,

"You know Ryan, for a guy that has kept me waiting for so long; you kiss me like I'm your sister." Marissa complained, as she smiled to herself. Ryan shrugged, realizing Marissa expected another kiss.

"Well then tell me, what are we?" Ryan said, and he noticed that it made no sense whatsoever, "I mean, are we exclusive? Are we boyfriend and girlfriend, or just seeing each other?" Ryan asked.

"Whatever you're ready for." Marissa said in a softer, but more serious tone. Her yearning for his kiss was there no longer, as she wondered why he would ask such a silly question, "We're here- _together- _are we not? Doesn't that kind of make us _together- _or are things in Chino different?" Ryan bit his lip, not knowing if he should continue with what his mind was begging him to say, "I know you're thinking something, Ryan- so spill." She demanded firmly.

"We don't do things different in Chino," Ryan started, and Marissa pressed him further, "You guys do it different _here. _Remember the first time we met- when you _expected _me to…" Ryan paused.

"That _again?" _Marissa groaned disbelievingly, "You're impossible Ryan! Are you ever going to let that go? I thought that was what _you _wanted." She said on her defense, and Ryan quickly cut in.

"It wasn't what I wanted, the first time we saw each other." Ryan said quickly, and Marissa pulled away from their close, and comfortable position. She stared at him, thinking the situation was absurd.

"So what are we?" Marissa asked defensively, as she stared at Ryan coldly. Ryan didn't know what to say, so the silence killed them both, as it started to eat away at them, "You don't know…" Marissa asked, seeming entirely hurt, but Ryan still didn't answer. Instead, he looked away, which stung Marissa in a way she could not describe, "I think I should go." She lowered her eyes, as she started to get up, "I thought things were going to be okay now, I thought this was going to be _it – _us, boyfriend and girlfriend." She said gently, "Guess not. Guess I have to be the one hurting in the end- I always am." Marissa sighed, as she touched the doorknob of the door. It sent chills down her spine, "I just can't believe you would, well, lead me on to believe that you _wanted _this, and that you didn't just want some make out buddy."

"I didn't lead you on." Ryan said, as he got up, and walked over to her, "What I mean by 'What are we' is that I just wanted to know if it was official… I wanted to know if I could brag to my friends yet, or if I should keep it quiet for a bit longer." Ryan blushed, and Marissa tried to hide her enlightenment.

"Shut up." Marissa pouted, as she said ever so quietly. Ryan looked straight into her eyes, and he noticed a smile lurking on her lips.

"Why?"

"Cause… I really like you, and I intended to leave here mad at you, and now you're just making things all better." Marissa frowned, "It's not supposed to work that way." She smiled a tiny smile, and Ryan simply shook his head, as he kissed her. Marissa closed her eyes the second their lips touched. Marissa's arms floated to his neck, as Ryan pulled her closer. Marissa finally pulled away from the kiss, "Damn you…" She muttered, before she kissed him again. Ryan chuckled, as he stationed his hands firmly on Marissa's waist.

Once the two finally had enough, they pulled away, almost at the same time. Marissa smiled, "Now _that _felt like I was your girlfriend. What do you say?" Marissa asked excitedly, her eyes flaring calmly.

"I say, fine- if I have to." Ryan joked, as he laughed at Marissa's shocked face. Marissa then glared at him, realizing it was a joke, as she tapped his shoulder in a punching-like motion. Ryan pecked her lips, and then muttered, "I'll have something to brag about, Marissa Cooper." He grinned.

"I guess I'll have something to brag about as well." Marissa repeated, "But I gotta go, _boyfriend- _I really do" She added, in case Ryan didn't believe her, "Even though we're neighbours, my mom kills me each time I'm late… plus, she'll think I'm hanging out with Cohen, which she _knows _is not possible." Marissa giggled, "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" She said, as she pulled away from Ryan's grip, "Bye." She whispered, as she turned to leave.

"Wait," Ryan touched her shoulder, "I'll walk you home." Marissa looked shocked, and then she smiled,

"I live next door, Ryan. I don't think I'll get raped or anything on the way there." Marissa rolled her eyes, giggling.

"It's not _that _it's just that's what boyfriends do with their girlfriends… and if we're 'together' we might as well start doing the cool stuff, with the goodnight kiss." Ryan grinned.

"Is that all you're in it for? The _goodnight kiss?_" Marissa asked, her mouth curled in a wide smiled.

"Well, duh- now that I have a hot chick to kiss, I might as well take advantage of it." Ryan smiled, and Marissa took his hand in hers, intertwining their fingers together.

"When you put it that way, come on." Marissa laughed softly.

Seth trudged outside of Summer's house, walking down the sidewalk with his hands in his pockets. Everything that night seemed so _perfect _until he realized the true Summer beneath. He couldn't comprehend whether or not she was like that all the time, or just because he was Seth Cohen. He kicked a stone underneath his foot violently- everything that happened to him, was because he was Seth Cohen- the comic book geek. It had been like that for ages. He generally had little or no friends, because he was Seth Cohen. God forbid he had a girlfriend, cause yet again- Seth Cohen. Everything added up tremendously, and it all depressed Seth more. There was nothing he understood- _nothing_.

Why was being a rich, curly-haired, comic book guy such a bad thing at Harbour? Rich- everyone at Harbour was rich. Seth grasped the thought that if he were poor, than he would be even more disliked. Curly-haired ; right, curly hair isn't 'in' if it's not longer then what guy's hair usually should be. As for comic books? Seth should have put down the first comic book he had ever touched, with the thought that it would get him _nowhere _in life.

Seth felt miserable, as he carried his feet one after the other, slowly and gradually. He figured he's eventually be able to get home, without getting mobbed, beat up, or jumped. He frowned, unable to understand why to Summer Roberts, he would always be _just _Seth Cohen.


	20. Chapter 20

(_Author's Note: Sorry for the lack of updates, however thank you for the reviews. Let me know what you think!)_

**Chapter Twenty

* * *

**

Summer sat in her room, as her television boomed, and cast shadows in the darkening room. She bit her lip, as she tried to emancipate her mind from the image of Seth's pouting face, and his strong, nevertheless sickening words. Summer closed her eyes deeply, as she crossed her legs on her bed. She felt awkward with every motion she made, and she realized Seth couldn't have gotten far- he couldn't of. She got up off of her bed, and took a glance at herself. She looked perfect; except for the mess that was going on inside. Her feet trampled outside her bedroom door, and soon, she was dashing down the stairs and outside her front door,

"Summer, where are you off to?" Her father's voice said worriedly,

"I'll be back in a few." Summer's piercing voice trickled out of her mouth, as she was far out of her house. She saw a dark silhouette, trudging toward the horizon. If she ran, she would make it to him, and she actually considered it. Soon, her heels were clicking and clacking down the sidewalk, and within a matter of time, her eyes met with Seth Cohen's.

His gaze was as shocked as her own, when she finally stopped, a little breathless. She looked up at him, not knowing what she was doing. Confusion trampled across her heart, as she looked up at him and laughed, "I'm sorry," She said, as she looked away, "I don't know what I'm doing here." She said, her tone more serious and challenging, "Sorry Seth, is basically all I came here to say; _nothing more." _She tried to convince herself, and with a last shrug, she turned around, as she lowered her head,

"Summer," Seth's voice entangled itself into Summer's already raging conscience. She turned around, as she tilted her head, as if ready for anything to slap her in the face, "You don't have to lie to yourself." Seth said, as his lips crumpled into an angered frown. Summer looked at him fiercely,

"Lie?" She asked him, as though she choked on his words, "When I say I'm sorry, I mean Cohen." She smiled gently, "I don't know what you mean." She said, "Other than I'm sorry – which I already said, thank you very much – I've got nothing to say." She said, as she turned around to leave. Seth exhaled, realizing Summer was making it so much harder for him to speak his mind.

The night wasn't entirely perfect either. Cars were storming the roads, and echoes of distant parties were filling the air. Summer simply smiled at him, a peculiar smile that he couldn't define, nor ignore, "Never mind." Seth nodded, as he shook his head gently, trying to make an open escape for his savage thoughts.

"Okay." Summer laughed a bit, her voice constantly preppy, and confident, "Fine by me, Cohen." She smiled, "Good night." She said quickly, as she started to walk down the sidewalk boldly. Seth watched her leave, and soon took her lead, as he started to walk the other way. His hands were placed in his pockets shamelessly, as he fumbled with his fingers, not knowing why he felt as though he had lost a million bucks- probably, because he had.

Summer couldn't help but feel constant awkwardness drifting through the air. She wondered if she had consumed her feelings well, and whether she had smothered her emotions clearly. She stuffed a tickling feeling in the pit of her stomach, down further, so that she could neglect it, and ignore with the sole hopes that it would go away. She kept repeating to herself, that whatever she felt, wasn't a feeling meant for Seth Cohen. She kept repeating to herself, that it simply could _not _be to Seth Cohen. _Girls like me, don't fall for guys like Seth – _She thought, her mind rampaging through all his expressions.

Her throat was getting dry, and in addition, she couldn't explain why. She knew she could never fall in _like _with Seth Cohen. It was just bizarre, even thinking about it. She decided that she wouldn't. Now that Seth left, she didn't have to look back. She didn't _have _to do anything, but her body made her head turn around, at the exact moment Seth did. She looked into his eyes, from such a distance, as she tried to explain to herself, in that moment, before she looked away, what _exactly _she was feeling. Seth continued to watch her leave, his eyes brimmed with uncertainty.

Summer smiled to herself, as she continued to walk, pride carrying her feet. She approached her house casually, as she opened the door. Her dad was waiting at the kitchen table, and she plopped down in front of him, "Were you actually worried?" Summer asked him, as she giggled.

"Well, yes, Summer. But you don't need to know that, now that you're back." He grinned, "Anything to eat?" He offered her, noticing she looked a bit hungry.

"No thanks." She said quickly, as she pressed her lips together, "I'm going to go upstairs; crash early tonight." Summer smiled, at her father's worried face.

"Did something happen?"

"I don't think so." Summer answered him in disbelief. Honestly, she needed some time to herself to answer that question. She was definitely not sure, "Goodnight daddy." She said, giving him a peck on the cheek, before she walked up the stairs, crashing down on her comfortable bed.

"Goodnight Marissa." Ryan said softly, as he smiled at her. She rolled her eyes,

"You know Ryan, if you want a fricking kiss, kiss me already." She laughed, as she looked up at him. He grinned,

"Will do." He said, as he kissed her ever so gently.

"So this is what you've been up to, Marissa." Julie swung the door open, as she glared at Ryan. Ryan pulled away from Marissa quickly, as he looked up at her mother frightfully, "Marissa, we'll discuss this _later._" Julie raised an eyebrow feverously, "At least, _now _I know _why _you're spending so much time, 'Hanging out with Seth'. However, this way, it going to cause you a two week grounding. Say your goodnights, and this young boy will be on his way." Julie spoke slowly, keeping her continuous glare, sweltering against Ryan's feeble face.

"I'm Ryan Atwood." Ryan extended his hand, trying to break the ice. Julie smirked, as she looked at his hand in disgust. She nodded, as she slammed the door shut, entering the dimly lit house. Marissa looked down, as she tried to find appropriate words to express herself, "You know what? Don't explain yourself. Moms are always weird when they find their daughters making out on their front foyer." Ryan, too, looked away, as he placed his hands on his hips, "So goodnight, then." Ryan looked at her clumsily, as he leaned in to give her a peck on the cheek.

Clearly, Marissa misunderstood that, as she cradled his face in her two hands, pulling him into a deep kiss. She pulled away with a smile, "I owed you that." She nodded, as she smiled shyly, turning to her door, "Goodnight- hopefully, for the last time tonight." Ryan laughed,

"Yeah, goodnight Marissa." He said, as he watched her disappear into her house, just as Julie had. As Ryan approached the Cohen household, he saw a figure walking from the darkness. He recognize the familiarity to be Seth Cohen. Ryan jogged over to him, as he swung his arm to his shoulder, in what was supposed to be a playful punch. It startled Seth, as he looked up abruptly, "You alright man?" Ryan asked, as he walked alongside his friend.

Seth glanced at him quickly, "Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks." Seth said coolly, as he twisted his fingers out of his pockets, "Really, don't worry yourself about it Ryan. Now that you're happy, I can't bring you down." He said gently. They reached the front door, and Ryan just stared at Seth, feeling quite distant from him,

"Listen, if you want to talk-"

"I _don't _want to talk." Seth cut him off, "It's not like I'll come to you anyway." Seth said coldly.

"Where is this coming from?" Ryan asked, staring at him vilely, so that Seth would understand that Ryan wouldn't take his shit.

"I'm not in the mood." Seth muttered somewhat apologetically.


End file.
